Xmas bonus

They've got to get Champ's 640 from somewhere. Someone else can expect
a rebate for 20 I suppose.

 

I got (in May) about 600 quid back from the tax office; my crowd pay me
14p a mile and I can claim a business expense of 40p a mile. I go to
the airport a fair amount (200 mile round trip) so each trip is worth a
notional expense of 52 quid to me; I get to have the tax refunded once a
year on this; which is nice.

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique,
typed

As a Septic once pointed out to me: "Tax refunds make you feel good
right up to the point where you remember it was your money in the first
place".

 

Well, the way it works at my place is I get given a budget of, say, 4%
of my salary bill (salary for my staff, I'm not included). After
discussion with my team leaders this is allocated in what seems the
fairest way based on performance over the year.

The problem comes with the well paid high-achievers, to give them more
than the notional 4% I would have to greatly disadvantage more than one
of the lower paid members of the team (who may well have done just as
well respectively). It's a difficult one.

Basically the people that do well stay at 4% or so, those

 

Well given that there's no way it costs me 80 quid to drive to the
airport and back I'm nice and secure in my little fantasy TYVFM.

 

Last year I paid too much tax, by 93 Euros. The taxman decided not to give
it to me 'cos they don't do any refunds less than 200 Euros. Bastards.

 

What is this "bonus" of which you speak?

 

On Sat, 20 Dec 2003 23:18:58 +0000, wrote:

That seems to be the way most sensible companies do it. Sadly our
place is over-beaucratised in the interests of creating work for
people (primarily HR) who have nothing better to do.

I appreciate the problem; it's even harder when you have a guy who has
consistently performed well such that he is now at the top of his
grade's pay band, and hence you cannot actually give him *any* rise
without promoting him, but there are no higher-grade jobs around (or
they aren't suitable). Solve that one!

..... those? ...

I see where you're coming from, and I think your way is fairest - the
people who know their staff's performance are able to determine their
staff's pay. Seems sensible. Unfortunately our way is such that the
managerial layer know that they will affect their own payrises if they
hand out too many high grades to us underlings, human nature being
what it is ...

The other problem with our supposed "fairer, more transparent"
technique is that because everything is divided up arbitrarily (ouch,
spelling that during a hangover hurt) all you need to do is make sure
5% of the staff are a lazier than you are you're guaranteed a normal
payrise. Under your place's system *everyone* who was a lazy ****
wouldn't get a decent rise so there'd be more to go around for the
handful keeping the place afloat ...

 

It was an evil plot by the Bread and Milk Barons to increase sales...

--
SimonB - South Wales. BOF#32
email simonb@zapikdotcodotuk
Triumph Sprint ST,
ZXR750L2 Wazimbaki.
Kawasaki Z1R For Sale

 

Don't start.. they gave me a formula for pay rises; one that spent more
than the allocated budget...

you can't. I was about to give my solution but the evening's Stella
intake caused my posting hand to slip.

The people at the lower grades tend to be assessed on their performance
and tend to get a rise that reflects their performance, between 2 and
6%; it's rare for a graduate to be completely demotivated.

The people in the higher grades (managers/team leaders) tend to get
around 3 or 4% since most of the ones that don't perform have been
weeded out by now. The few that lose their rise are told it's not
greatly a reflection on them but that others have really worked their
arses off and a little money has needed to be found. Sorry but it's a
tough world and all that.

The people in the middling grades tend to get between 3 and 5%, picking
up the money sliced off at the top; these are the people that really
need to be motivated since they're the worker ants in the organisation

Well they tried to match the grading to the salary rise but... when the
salaries are in wide bands and people are sat in different positions
this is difficult. Plus we have an appraisal system with gradings of
"E"- Exceeds expectations, "S"- Satisfactory performance and "I"- needs
Improvement; what a crap selection of gradings... there needs to be
something between E and S.

This is supposedly true. I don't think anyone likes the way it works in
our place either for what it's worth. It's nice when you've got someone
serving (three months) notice during the review period since you can
give them 0% and pass their rise onto others that deserve it. I had
someone kick off at me about this once! Fucker was leaving and expected
a pay rise in his last month.

 

I am looking forward to this next year. We get 23p a mileand I am
currently just short of 9k

 

On Sun, 21 Dec 2003 10:40:15 +0000, wrote:

All I can say is that you have my sympathy. I doubt there is a
perfect system, other than making everyone self-employed so they can
charge what the market will bear. Of course, that would mean most
people would plunge into poverty, there not being a huge market for
"fat bloke who eats crisps all day while spilling coffee in his
keyboard" or "office gossip who spends 4 hours a day on the phone to
friends" )

 

We didn't get a bonus, but we got an abso-fuckin-lutely fantastic Christmas
Party which was all paid for.

 

Paul Corfield wrote:

Neither, I just had an understanding boss. Well for one night of the
year, mostly he was a ****.

 

Hmm... 9k in 9 months = 12k a year.

For the first 10k miles you get 40p a mile allowance, therefore you can
claim 10,000*(.4-.23)=1,700 ukp
And for the 2k miles you get a 25p a mile allowance, therefore you can
claim 2,000*(.25-.23)=40ukp

So that's 1,740ukp you can claim as a legitimate business expense
pushing 1,740 quid out of the taxman's grasp... resulting in a rebate
(assuming higher rate and PAYE) of 1,720*.40 = 696 quid. Nice enough.

 

While this made me smile, the fact you went to the extreeme of working it
out is very worrying.
(I would stick a smiley in, but I know you hate them)

 

That will be because the tax allowance has gone up from 75ukp/head to
150ukp/head.

 

Well:
a) it's hardly rocket science
b) I've a spreadsheet I use for holding various tax return calculations
in so it takes next to no time (about 1 minute).

I had real problems making the date for the tax returns in the past so
I've changed my 'record keeping' and stuff so I'm ready for the tax
return when it hits.

Everything's filed; dividend statements, interest payments etc. all
ready for the date I can put the return in. That way there's no hassle
at the end of the year; oh, and I get the money back that the Inland
Revenue owe me sooner which is good 'cos surprisingly despite it being
*my* money they don't pay me interest on it...

 

I'd rather have a tax-free lump of 150ukp tyvm than spend more time with
my workmates.

 

A bottle of red wine and an announcement that the company's being sold
off to the likes of EDS, Capita and BT, depending who'll cough up the
most.

Merry Christmas, one and all.