What not to say after a crash...

1 "Dude, I couldn't have heard the car hit me if I'd been wearing a helmet"

2 "Man there was nothing I could do, so I laid it down for safety"

3 "Shessh, how was I to know they couldn't see me"

4 "Ouch, I burned myself on the pavement because it was too hot to wear
leathers"

5 "See, I wasn't wearing my helmet because they will make you crash"

6 "Sorry Officer, if I'd known this was going to happen, I wouldn't have
has that extra beer"

7 "This is no shit, I didn't think I could make the corner, so I hit the
guardrail"

8 "OK OK, it was just supposed to be a little wheelie"

9 "So I didn't think it was the slippery kind of oil"

10 "No lie... I figured using the front brake would make me crash. So I
didn't"

11 "Yo, it's not my fault they make these curbs made so hard"

12 "I just cleaned my helmet and I didn't want to get it dirty by
wearing it"

13 "There I was trying to turn the handlebar the other way, but the darn
thing turned right into it anyway"

14 "I never wear a crash helmet, if I crash, I want to get killed and
not just dain bramage"

Larry L
94 RC45 #2
Have a wheelie NICE day...
Lean & Mean it in every corner of your life...
If it wasn't for us the fast lane would rust...
V4'S are music to the seat of my pants...
1952 De Havilland Chipmunk...
Yank and bank your brains loose...
http://members.ebay.com/aboutme/-xlax-/
http://home.comcast.net/~netters2/
http://www.fox302.com/index.pl?s=vg&user=netters2

 

You can only say this if you hit the water with the front wheel in the air.



RickB - My favorite, "I had to lay it down"....

 

"Hey, will you do that again, my girlfriend missed it!"

 

Why penalize those who have had the foresight to prepare a remark
in advance and have it tatooed somewhere on the torso (limbs and
heads being sometimes harder to locate)?

When contacting a public figure for obituary material to
be kept on file in the event of said figure's demise, we
were told to say: "I'd like to interview you for a short
biographical piece which will not be published during
your lifetime."

 

I was nearly ejected from Carlsbad after holding up a pitboard that said
"Crash NOW" to all riders on final lap.

 

And on the part of readers of these newsgroups. It's a fantasy
that helps me get through the day.

Ship (suitably wrapped) this corpse (or as many parts
as you can collect) to:

some loser
1234 street
city state zip

Postage Guaranteed

 

Larry, you stole those out of Motorcyclist circa 1991 or so didn't you? I
think it was a "Best of Motorcycling" issue... In fact, now that I think of
it, didn't you have a quote published? Something about an environmental
impact study?

Jason

 

Right on Jason...


In fact, now that I think of

No... environmental impact study comment goes back to a 70's Dirt Bike
magazine...

Larry L
94 RC45 #2
Have a wheelie NICE day...
Lean & Mean it in every corner of your life...
If it wasn't for us the fast lane would rust...
V4'S are music to the seat of my pants...
1952 De Havilland Chipmunk...
Yank and bank your brains loose...
http://members.ebay.com/aboutme/-xlax-/
http://home.comcast.net/~netters2/
http://www.fox302.com/index.pl?s=vg&user=netters2

 

All actually said/performed by me:

1) Bystander: "Do you know where you are?"
Me: "Laying in Alice's parking lot"
Bystander: "No! You're in Ireland!"
ME: "THEN GET ME A GUINNESS!"

2) <Laying there with two broken arms, out of the blue a co-worker walks up>
"I think I'm going to be late for work"

3) <Gets up from side of road and starts running after car>
"HEY! HEY! YOU!"
<Flops back down onto road>

 

Not funny what happened to your leg, Sunny. But I couldn't resist:

http://idisk.mac.com/jkortegard-Public/911call2.wav

I dedicate this to all the DeerSlayers out there. You know who you are.

--
Jamin Kortegard
2002 YZF-R1 / 2003 WRX

"Hokey 600s and trackday usability are no match
for a good literbike at your side, kid."
- Michael

 

One of these days, I'll get my deer slaying Vulcan 1500 Classic put back
together.

--
Odinn

'03 FLHTI ........... http://www.sloanclan.org/gallery/ElectraGlide
'97 VN1500D ......... http://www.sloanclan.org/gallery/VulcanClassic
Atlanta Biker Net ... http://www.atlantabiker.net
Vulcan Riders Assoc . http://www.vulcanriders.org

Fill in the blanks to reply

 

Ouch!

RickB

 

I think the ER people are a little more sensitive then the EMT types.
The EMTs turned my best jacket/pants into something unrecognizable in a
matter of seconds.

--
muddy

Testing the limits of gravity since 1947.

icq - 219328929

 

Do you blame em? If I was an EMT, and there is any QUESTION about the
victim's legs, the pants get sliced off, as most pants aren't like
aerostich/cordura (zip up the legs), and you don't want to be yanking
someone's pants down over a broken leg.

 

The guy that cut my ballistic pants off me bypassed the zipper and just
cut the fuckers. So, you are spot on, they just like to destroy things.

I used to work for Advanced Computer Controls. We made repeater
controllers for mountain-top radio systems. These things were bloody
marvelous. You could send a touch-tone command and the controller would
speak the response. It would also give the station ID in a voice
message. One of our controllers was on a system on Monterey, CA. The had
a rather large fire heading up the mountain and it started the building
on fire. As the equipment started to burn the controller started
speaking random messages, then words. The voice got high-pitched and
then it started speaking gibberish. It was really pathetic to hear it
die.

--
muddy

Testing the limits of gravity since 1947.

icq - 219328929

 

Was it nicknamed HAL?

 

*snort*

No, they actually did what you told them too.

--
muddy

Testing the limits of gravity since 1947.

icq - 219328929

 

Wow!
I'm lucky. (As I sit here with my crutches and a steel rod in my leg
from that STOOPID pocket bike!!) It's a pretty sickening feeling to be
holding your ankle for dear life as it's wobbling around independantly of
your shin.
I told the EMT's to cut whatever they wanted, but I that I was allergic
to Morphine, so they started me on Demerol right off the bat. They
actually saved my leather belt and gave it to my wife at the ER. Plus,
the whole time I was screaming bloody murder (ain't ashamed to admit it,
either) during X-rays one of the ER nurses was just standing next to me
holding my hand and saying "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," over and over.
They couldn't get me into surgery until morning, so it took a whole lot
of Demerol before I would let them splint me. I was so doped that I can
clearly remember the conversations, but don't have a single visual memory
until about an hour after they got me into a room.
They can cut whatever they want. As long as the shoe went one way and my
foot stayed with me, I was happy.
Z.

 

Mine:

"Glad it wasn't my bike..."

and

"Oh well, I was going to rebuild it anyway"