Two up stories, please

LOL!

I usually just get a very loud WHAP on the helmet. Gets my ears ringing!

 

And English too - when I broke my ankle, the bloke who darted out (Insane
move.. I have to admire his balls, driving into a CX like that) "Went to
move his car" and never returned.

****. And the witnesses were pretty cuntish, too; ignoring my suggestion
that they should take down the guy's numberplate in favour of numptyish
mutterings like: "You're alright mate, still in one piece" etc. CUNTS.

Neil

 

How did discussion of sex with my wife enter this? And as much as I
like motorcycling, riding the fucking thing is a great way to pass time
too.

Only after Mexican food does my riding involve an orchestral wind
section.

But semi-seriously, learning is best accomplished in bite-sized pieces.
My riding lesson consisted of a buddy of mine putting me on his 450cc
Nighthawk in the parking lot at the Del Mar race track and letting me
ride around for a bit. Then I got my learner's permit (consisting
entirely of a written exam at the time), bought my first motorcycle
then and eventually passed the driving test which consisted of driving
between some lines, around some cones and then around the block at the
DMV office. I assume the deal is that if you made it around the block
you get your license.

Not too long thereafter I stuffed that GS450 into a guardrail at about
70mph (+/-113km/h) and fucked my shoulder up. (That's one of the
reasons that I said in another place that I can't hack the full race
crouch of the GSXR/FZR/CBRs anymore.)

If she's going to learn how to ride she's certainly going to get better
instruction than I did and ideally learn in the classroom or a parking
lot the things I learned on Palomar Mountain.

Bollocks. I may not have the stamina or be able to generate the speed
that the FZR400 pistons do, but I do offer advantages as well.

Bob
Rancho Cucamonga, CA

 

Lumme - when me and the missus did California a while back, I found the
Dodge Stratus to be a jerky mess, requiring more skill to pull away than a
manual. So maybe we shouldn't be to hard on our "Septic" friends.

There is no "Auto" bike though (Yeah, I know, I know, but it's shit 70's
Honda nonsense) so if you're going to ride, it's in at the deep end or
nothing.

Neil

 

Well, you can look to either side, if you have the nerve and aren't
troubled by motion sickness, but in general, she's right. Riding
pillion isn't much fun. My wife only does it because it gives her and
excuse to cuddle which she can't do very well when I'm driving the
cage.

Maybe it's not so bad, however. I couldn't persuade her to get her own
motorcycle, and she was riding before I was.

Al Moore
DoD 734

 

Bob wrote

If it's of any help, we have published a book called: The
Megarider Guide To Pillion Riding. It contains all the
information a pillion rider should know and all rules s/he
should keep.

It was interesting writing it. I was surprised how much a
pillion rider needed to know - in addition to the golden
rule: do not fiddle with the rider at critical moments, of
course...

 

wrote in @o13g2000cwo.googlegroups.com:

I saw a statistic recently that said that the majority of people buying
cars with manual transmissions were women.

 

Tell her to **** off and ride her own bike. This is the best solution
for everyone.

 

<fear> That's not good, is it? Over 'ere one has to:

1) Do a half/full day course called a CBT before one is allowed on the
road (and only on a bike up to 125cc)

2) Then needs to pass a multiple choice Theory Test and a 15 minute
Hazard Perception (video) test.

3) To ride anything with a bit of oomph one then needs to complete
(what is normally a) 4 or 5 day (full time) riding course called a
"Direct Access" course and then complete a 45 minute practical test.
The test involves riding in a wide variety of situations (Around town,
joining high speed roads, low speed, emergency stops, U-Turns and a
variety of other bits and bobs.) and if one isn't perfect then one
doesn't pass the test and has to do more training.

 

That's not good, is it? Is riding in England any safer for youngsters
than the good old days when you could:
1) Buy an LC250*.
2) Ride it.
And optionally:
3) Take a half-hour test, riding round the block while the examiner watches
from various vantage points and leaps out into the road for the
emergency stop.
4) Buy a Ducati.

* Or a 350 with 250 decals and hope that the police don't notice the
twin discs.

 

Well there's also the Guzzi Convert*.
http://www.bikez.com/motorcycles/moto_guzzi_v_1000_i-convert_1976.php
http://www.bikepics.com/pictures/066713/

Does a Gilera DNA count ? It's pretending to be a motorbike.

JL
(*also a shit 70's bike but not a Honda)

 

What a load of utter rubbish. Most sports bikes (as opposed to an FJR
which is a lard arse tourer*) have the pillion sitting considerably
higher than the rider. Besides which she doesn't need to see over your
head, only over your shoulder, given the fairly small height difference
(5'5 to 5'8 ?) she should have no problem seeing.

My girlfriend gets the shits if I don't take her out on the bike (which
is a pisser if you want to have a fang).

JL
*(as opposed to a Harley Ferguson, which can't stop, can't go and
doesn't handle, and hence should be classified as a tractor not a tourer)

 

wrote

Because I raised it, because your fears are relevant.

and then followed it with

Before we got down to this:-

Your attitudes are all wrong, there is no reason why your bitch can't
learn how to ride her own bike and learn how to do it well, you just
need to throw out the Quaker in you along with the rest of your dirty
bathwater.

You can't give her good sex now and if she does actually learn how to
ride without your help it ain't gonna get any better, you know it and
you are scared of it.

 

Why not? Sounds great to me.

Did that on a moped.

Didn't do that.

Bollocks to that. A few months pratting about on a moped and a 125,
then a couple of days bunking off school to play silly buggers up and
down the local bypass, practising lifesavers on the roundabout halfway
along, then the test.

Training schmaining, and I ain't dead yet.

 

But remember, y'all never ride far or long - there isn't enough room to.

 

Eiron says...

My test took 10 minutes. He knew I was a riding god within 5 minutes but
it was a 5 minute walk for him back to the test centre to do the
formalities. I passed 5 days after my 17th birthday in April 1979, with
absolutely no training at all. When I'd collected my pass certificate a
good mate who was waiting threw me the keys to his Honda CB900F and I
rode away from the test centre on that.

I'm not saying I'm good, just that the bike test back then was a fucking
joke.

 

Vito says...

That's because we don't have to ride that far to be away from everyone
who might be our aunt or our sister.

 

Lozzo wrote:

It's not that much better now, after all, they passed me 1st time.

--
Dan L (Oldbloke)
My bike 1996 Kawasaki ZR1100 Zephyr
M'boy's bike 2003 Honda NSR125R (Going)
Spare Bike 1990 Suzuki TS50X (Patio Ornament)
BOTAFOT #140 (KotL 2005), X-FOT#000, DIAABTCOD #26, BOMB#18 (slow)

 

Dan L says...

Good pojnt well made. I think he may have felt sorry for you, after
seeing your old boots.

 

Turby says...

I'm not British. The Brits are very laid back, they can't understand why
you yanks get so uptight about things. Maybe you should all cut down on
the coffee and cocaine for a while.