Two up stories, please

wrote in message

I was a little too pissed to ride my own bike, so a friend gave me a
lift.

We went around a corner and found some **** on the wrong side of the
road driving straight towards us. My friend swerved to avoid the car
but there wasn't room. We hit the front.

Both bones in my lower left leg were broken. As I lay on the ground
swearing after trying to stand on it, the car driver came across. His
words of wisdom delivered in a texan drawl "you guys were going too
fast".

Typical fucking American, blind, stupid and with a sense that no matter
how wrong he is, he's right.

 

Chris Malcolm says...

Take my advice, if the bike has an intercom, rip the sodding thing out.
The last thing you want is some daft tart wittering in your ear that her
arse hurts or that she needs a piss every 5 minutes.

 

Lozzo wrote

More like a Fleet Support Vessel I would have said but hyperspace
enabled certainly.

 

Hmm I rather like the thought of them being kept waiting and then just
pissing on the move. White cotton panties and jeans style leather
trousers. Golden shower at 120.

'Hog

 

Ever heard the fairy tale about Goldilocks & the Three Bears? They're
*just right.*

Bob
Rancho Cucamonga, CA

 

I've considered that, in a sense. I figured I can buy her an old
FZR400 and then when she gets tired of it I'll convert it to a full
race bike and start riding at Willow Springs. Unfortunately, she's not
daft enough to see through *that* plan....only daft enough to have
married me in the first place.

Besides, if I'm going to get her a motorcycle, I'm going to have to
teach her to drive a manual transmission. Sadly, it doesn't appear
that any of the car rental companies around here are stupid enough to
rent manual transmission cars anymore. After she's got that down we
can hit an MSF class.

Bob
Rancho Cucamonga, CA

 

Oh **** that had to hurt.

Went to one of the local cycle supply versions of Costco this weekend
and was amazed at how far protective gear has come since I was last on
a bike.

Bob
Rancho Cucamonga, CA

 

says...

What has driving a manual car and riding a bike have to do with each
other?

What's MSF?

In the UK the vast majority of cars have manual transmissions. We figure
that if you can't get your brain to work it's way around using a clutch
and selecting the appropriate gear, then you have no business being on
the road.

 

Well that's part of the issue. In her opinion I drive my car like a
"fucking lunatic" and she's convinced that I'm going to continue that
habit on a motorcycle and smear myself over a half mile of asphalt.

In my defense, I disagree vigorously with the aspersions cast at my
driving style and prefer to characterize it as purposeful.

Oh come on now. I can't pull off the Harley look, as cool of bikes as
they seem to be. The last thing the world needs is another white
collar finance guy on a Hog. If I was going to get a Harley it'd be an
old classic type to restore and enjoy. A pricey hobby and I don't need
another one of those.

On the BMW front, I already own one: a 1999 M3 convertible. I love the
car, but it's like having a mistress. "Honey, I need more money.
Honey, I need more attention. Honey, I need more money." Love the
car, but the quality control clearly sucks and while I'd probably
consider buying another BMW car (though never another convertible
unless the top was manual) I'm just not interested in having those QC
issues on a motorcycle too.

Perhaps with an aftermarket saddle the FJR will make the best
compromise between performance and comfort. I've wrecked too hard and
too many times to spend any length of time in the position that bikes
like the FZR or CBR put one into anymore.

Bob
Rancho Cucamonga, CA

 

Does she wake up on hot nights and find that they've flopped into her
arm pits?

 

Do I remember something from the last BoSM about an american
agent/colleague who used a rental car in the UK and managed to blow it
up in a very short period of time?

 

Just stay off the I5. It's the most boring chunk of road ever made. If
you need to head up/down CA then use 101 or a combo of 101 and 1. In
any case, just stay off the 5. It sucks.

Rayvan

 

Daz, please inform your wonderful missus that the phrase "My lips
stretch from cheek dimple to cheek dimple as I smile at the delight
of..." sets off the content filter.

 

[on pillioning]

Paging Alex F! Murrican chap here who could hire you to chauffeur his
missus around.

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique, Wik

And there was me thinking that was just me.

I was a bit startled by her description of Bruce as: "Another funny
person who somewhat reminded me of a rugby player in leather.".

Especially when I read at the end: "My inner thighs are so stiff I feel
like I had been riding a horse or a whole rugby team all weekend.".

I mean, you could think there was something subliminal going on there.

If you didn't know Bruce.

--
Wicked Uncle Nigel - Manufacturer of the "Champion-105" range of rearsets
and Ducati Race Engineer.

WS* GHPOTHUF#24 APOSTLE#14 DLC#1 COFF#20 BOTAFOT#150 HYPO#0(KoTL) IbW#41
SBS#39 Enfield 500 Curry House Racer "The Basmati Rice Burner",
Honda GL1000K2 (On its hols) Kawasaki ZN1300 Voyager "Oh, Oh, It's so big"
Suzuki TS250 "The Africa Single" Yamaha GTS1000

 

That's what they're supposed to do and how you can tell the real ones
from aftermarket bolt-ons, didn't you know?

Bob
Rancho Cucamonga, CA

 

Indeed, indeed. I'm right at the junction of I-10 and I-15 and my dad
lives in Escondido (at I-15 and SR-78), so I've spent many an hour
traipsing up and down I-15. Usually the wife just buries her nose in a
book and ignores everything unless the wind/engine noise gets to the
point where she feels compelled to look up and say "you don't need to
be doing ___ mph."

On the bright side, my mother lives in Solana Beach, so I can take I-15
to Del Dios Highway and then fly down S6(?) straight into Solana Beach.


Come to think of it, she's usually grabbing at the door handles in the
car when we're on that road. I'm going to have to really moderate
things on the bike lest she strangle me....

Bob
Rancho Cucamonga, CA

 

Just that they're both manual transmission vehicles. I don't know that
I'd want her to have to deal with learning to modulate clutch and
throttle at the same time she's trying to learn how to ride a
motorcycle.

BTW, she's got tremendous experience show jumping horses from her
youth. I wonder if that will be reflected in her sense of balance on a
motorcycle and, if so, how.

Motorcycle Safety Foundation. I had assumed they had a multinational
presence (not noting the URL notwithstanding), but apparently not.
They offer rider traing. www.msf-usa.org

That's the case on the Continent as well, no? I think it's mostly
Americans who tend to be fat and lazy and want their gears shifted for
them so that they can get through the Starbucks drive-through with a
minimum of fuss and reduced risk of spillage. Personally I've always
hated auto transmissions.

But I live in California too, where the driver testing consists largely
of holding a mirror in front of the mouth of the applicant to confirm
that they are indeed breathing.

Bob
Rancho Cucamonga, CA

 

wrote

What utter rubbish. The whole point of what you would call The
Motorcycle Experience and I would call riding the fucking thing is in
modulating the clutch, the throttle, tapping the gear lever, adjusting
the point of balance, the amount of sail into the wind, the degree of
pressure on the inside bar, the fingers just unlocking from the front
brake, a toe a little more than resting on the rear and all going on
together in an exquisitely choreographed instinctive ballet with an
orchestral wind section like you have never heard.

You are frightened she will enjoy it more than sex you are.

 

says...

Rubbish. Here in the UK kids aren't allowed to drive cars until a year
after they can legally ride a geared moped. Most of them seem to take to
riding a geared bike naturally and most go on to drive manual cars. I
know only two people who couldn't drive a manual so had to take the auto
test. Why is everything in USA such a drama?

I doubt it. Motorcycling is more to do with common sense than balance.

That's a very good idea, there is no substitute for professional
training.

In Germany maybe, but a lot of French and Italian drivers prefer
manuals. I don't mind autos as long as they have a big engine and I'm
covering a lot of miles a year. In any other case I find them annoying.

So i noticed when I was over there 10 years ago.