Thinking of silly loads on bikes....

Our bike club met up for a pint or two on Friday night, and one of our
lot who used to do some despatch riding revealed that he once tried to
carry a complete Honda 250 Super Dream engine on the back of his
nearly-dead 250 Super Dream, prior to doing an engine swap.

Anyway, he hadn't lashed down the load well enough, and as he was going
(slowly) down the road it slipped off the seat. The shift in the load
made him swerve, and yes, he overbalanced and went down in a heap.

A friendly DR coming the other way screeched to a halt and said: "Don't
move, mate, I'll stop her!" and zoomed off in pursuit of some innocent
biddy who'd just driven past.

Steve watched as he forced her to a halt and then proceeded to give
every panel down one side of her car a severe kicking, and realised that
his DR White Knight thought she'd knocked him off and done a runner.

Amazingly, the biddy did a U-turn and followed the DR back to where
Steve was pulling his bike upright and trying to put his engine back on
board.

"And he'd absolutely mullered the side of her car with those bloody
great motocross boots you see despatch riders wearing......"

Somehow, Steve thought that life was now getting just too complicated,
so he said: "Thanks, mate!" and buggered off, leaving the DR and the
biddy to sort things out between them.

I laughed like a drain at the time. OK, so it seems less funny now, but
I thought it was worth sharing.

 

Gants Hill Roundabout Eastbound mumbltyten years ago My 305 wedged by an
opened door between the cage full of screaming teenage girls who had
opened it and the bloke on the outside who was "driving his obviously
still drivable mate company car home when something went bang into the
back of him", me into the rear nearside as it goes who was doing a happy
jig because I still had legs, biker witness filtering immediately behind
swearing I was doing 10-15 "honest mate you were" the woman driver
begging for mercy because "it was all her fault" and into it comes DR
looking to start a fight in the same way as TOG's mate. Awesome fucking
timing. The driver started begging him for mercy and the rest of us
sort of joined in and I did another little happy jig to show him me legs
were fine got him turned round and packed him on his way except the
girls who got even more hysterical and the one of them who had opened
the door to be sick was and then I just sort of ended up collecting the
details and after stuffing an indictor into me bag and kicking the
headlight sort of straight getting on the bike and riding home without a
front brake lever. The girls had stopped screaming and taken up heavy
sobbing but the one being sick still was when I left.

 

What exactly IS it that you drink Steve?


--
Beav

VN 750
Zed 1000
OMF# 19

 

A pint of his own urine, first thing every morning.

--
Dan L

Too much time to think, too little to do.


http://thebikeshed.spaces.live.com/
1996 Kawasaki ZR1100 Zephyr

BOTAFOT #140 (KotL 2005/6/7)
X-FOT#000
DIAABTCOD #26
BOMB#18 (slow)
OMF#11

 

A pint of LSD I suspect.

Phil

 

That story would have been fucking hilarious if recounted in English...

D.

 

Well whatever it is, I want some.


--
Beav

VN 750
Zed 1000
OMF# 19

 

It's quite easy - just OD on insulin and sit there spouting gibberish
before slipping into a coma. No-one would notice any difference between
that and Auvache..

Phil.

 

Tea.

 

Never touch the stuff. Well not for 20 or so years anyway.

I do have to explain I suppose that the view I have of that incident is
so surreal it is untrue but then it was. It lasted but five minutes
from start to end and I remember most of the beginning of it as if it
had happened just a minute ago. When I replay it in my mind there is a
clear image from my pov of me going down the road doing nothing more
than filtering along on me way home when it all kicked off and from
there it went through astonishment, horror, joy, farce, more joy and
even more farce. It ends with the camera pulling up and back away from
a slowly shrinking pink circle in a moving sea of grey, the sobbing and
weeping morphing into the sound of a retreating motorbike as the whole
thing fades to black.

You had to be there.

 

On 2nd thoughts....


--
Beav

VN 750
Zed 1000
OMF# 19

 

You'll do for me then. A man's drink.


--
Beav

VN 750
Zed 1000
OMF# 19