The excuses thread

Bike is in the process of bring written off due to beans being counted.

Wrist is still broken.

And I'll be in trouble if I go out but that's not the real reason. Not a
bit. Honest.

 

Let me give you a starter for 10 ...

"The public sector 'saves money' by offering lower salaries than the private
sector. Naturally this means that they attract the sort of employees that
the public sector has had a good look at and has decided it wouldn't trust
to operate a keyboard, let alone try to do real work. To compensate for
this the public sector ships in vastly overpaid consultants to do their
actual thinking for them. Unfortunately it is then not possible to transfer
knowledge from the consultants to the permanent employees for the same
reason that you can't drain a 5 gallon petrol can in to a tea-cup while your
house is on fire. Therefore the consultants end up with contracts that span
years while the full-time employees are actively anti-productive; consuming
resources, getting in the contractors way and playing low-level office
politics. In fact their main purpose is to make it look like the senior
management control vast empires, thus increasing their chances of moving in
to senior managerial roles in the private sector for vast wedges of woonga.
Ultimately, therefore, more money could be saved by paying above the market
rate and employing fewer staff overall, but ensuring that the average
intelligence of those who are employed outstrips that of, say, a random
collection of things found under a garden stone, and also allowing senior
management to willfully lie on their CVs about how many staff they do
manage."

Actually, reading that back, I think it's a bit long for a title.

--
AndrewR, D.Bot (Celeritas)
Aprilia RSV-1000R, Honda VFR750F-L
BOTAFOT#2,ITJWTFO#6,UKRMRM#1/13a,MCT#1,DFV#2,SKoGA#0 (and KotL)
BotToS#5,SBS#25,IbW#34, DS#5, COSOC# Suspended, KotTFSTR#
The speccy Geordie twat.

 

Muscular trauma of the lower back, on top of sciatica.

How's that?

 

I think it's quite snappy. Has a ring to it.

--
Catman MIB#14 SKoGA#6 TEAR#4 BOTAFOF#38 Apostle#21 COSOC#3
Tyger, Tyger Burning Bright (Remove rust to reply)
116 Giulietta 3.0l Sprint 1.7 145 2.0 Cloverleaf 156 V6 2.5 S2
Triumph Sprint ST 1050: It's blue, see.
www.cuore-sportivo.co.uk

 

In communiqué <Lktpl.80983$2.easynews.com>,

I prefer this:

"It's what you do with what you've got."

--
+----------------------------------------------------------------+
| Pete Fisher at Home: |
| Voxan Roadster Gilera Nordwest * 2 Yamaha WR250Z |
| Gilera GFR * 2 Moto Morini 2C/375 Morini 350 "Forgotten Error" |
+----------------------------------------------------------------+

 

#It ain't what you do, it's the way that you do it

 

Matron says I'm still infectious.

 

Forwarded to my team..

Phil

 

No it wouldn't. It's rubbish.
The only true V-twins are Italian.
Everybody knows that.

 

It is?

You wouldn't know it. On the BBC website, the latest WSB news is
"Neukirchner & Xaus win at Misano", dated June last year.

 

And who is going to push it back up the hill if it doesnt take ?.
Sorted now anyway.

 

Thanks, but I'll be asleep.

Of course, we don't get Eurosport either, but even if we did, I'd still
be asleep. )

 

I only have one leg

 

ogden wrote:

Wotcha.

There's a tiger in the garden, and I can't get the bike out until it's gone.

 

Some people really do have a Tiger in the garden... or have I been
whooshed?

 

BGN doesn't....

--
Catman MIB#14 SKoGA#6 TEAR#4 BOTAFOF#38 Apostle#21 COSOC#3
Tyger, Tyger Burning Bright (Remove rust to reply)
116 Giulietta 3.0l Sprint 1.7 145 2.0 Cloverleaf 156 V6 2.5 S2
Triumph Sprint ST 1050: It's blue, see.
www.cuore-sportivo.co.uk

 

Poof.

 

Remind me, are you a public sector employee, or a consultant?

 

Not very funny.

 

Are you off the crutches now??