OT? New Haynes manual.

I presume it has everything you need to know about suck, squeeze, bang
and blow.

http://www.haynes.co.uk/sexmanual.asp

Just the thing for your cum spray booth?

Moike

 

also these 2
http://www.guidesgalore.com.au/product_detail.asp?ID=4229
http://www.guidesgalore.com.au/product_detail.asp?ID=4228

I like these from the Haynes manual
Older readers may remember the useful

Mini van, complete with mattress in the

back. A colleague who had struck lucky

one night retired to the local beauty

spot with his new lady friend. He

dropped his trousers in the front seats

while she was making herself

comfortable in the back. The passion of

the moment getting the better of him,

he tipped the seats forward to give

them the maximum amount of room

and scrambled into the back as fast as

he could, slipping on to the floor as he

did.

The resulting scraped knee didn't

worry either of them and they got down

to the matter at hand with the usual

enthusiasm, until both became aware of

an unfamiliar and increasingly

unpleasant burning sensation 'down

there'.

The same older readers will

remember that the battery on a Mini van

is located behind the driver's seat and

that the clamping arrangements are

typically weak and ineffective. After a

few years most Mini vans have their

battery terminals completely exposed,

the flimsy cover having been discarded

long ago.

You know that white fluffy stuff that

grows on the top of battery terminals? -

especially those of older, knackered

Mini vans? Well you really don't want to

get any of that on your willy and so into

your girlfriend...

SAFER SEX

When it comes to STIs, there's no such thing as totally safe sex - though
you can

eliminate about 99% of the risks by always using a condom for any kind of

penetrative sex. The risk factors for the activities below are valid for
most STIs.

These activities are These activities are These activities are These
activities are

certainly high-risk possibly risky probably safe certainly safe

Anal sex without a Oral sex without a condom Anal or vaginal sex with
Cuddling, hugging,

condom (on the penis) or other a suitable condom non-sexual massage

barrier (over the vagina

or anus)

Vaginal sex without Sharing sex toys without Oral sex with a condom Kissing
(without

a condom sterilising them between or other barrier exchange of saliva)

users. (Or you can use

condoms on a dildo)

Sharing drug injecting Sharing a toothbrush or Non-penetrative sex,

equipment a razor including mutual masturbation

Kissing (with exchange of saliva)



Burning

.. Beware of friction burns from the

carpet when having sex on the

floor. Knee and elbow pads may

provide some protection.

Poisonous or irritant

substances

.. Keep them off your naughty bits -

see Allergies in Chapter 6.

.. If you've been handling chilli

peppers, wash your hands

thoroughly before handling

anything else!

 

In aus.motorcycles on Mon, 02 Feb 2004 17:18:26 +1100

"As you would expect from Haynes, this manual contains detailed
explanations of how the relevant parts work and fit together, what
happens if they don't, and what you can do about it."

What do you suppose is the equivalent of "Assembly is the reverse of
dissassembly"? And when it says "remove", how big a hammer do you need?

Zebee
- wondering which diagrams are not for the models you have in the shed.

 

Aha! It's the Haynes Book of Lays!

-----sharks

 

I bow down before a superior intellect.

Moike