{OT} Crap Joke ...

Discussion in 'UK Motorcycles' started by Guest, Jun 28, 2004.

  1. Guest

    Guest Guest

    Fast forward to 2006 - it is just before Scotland v Brazil at the next World Cup Group game. Ronaldo goes into the Brazilian changing room to find all his teammates looking a bit glum.

    "What's up?" he asks.

    "Well, we're having trouble getting motivated for this game. We know it's important but it's only Scotland. They're shite and we can't be bothered".

    Ronaldo looks at them and says "Well, I reckon I can beat these by myself, you lads go down the pub."

    So Ronaldo goes out to play Scotland by himself and the rest of the Brazilian team go off for a few jars.

    After a few pints they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the teletext on. A big cheer goes up as the screen reads "Brazil 1 - Scotland 0 (Ronaldo 10 minutes)". He is beating Scotland all by himself!

    Anyway, a few more pints later and the game is forgotten until someone remembers "It must be full time now, let's see how he got on". They put the teletext on.

    "Result from the Stadium "Brazil 1 (Ronaldo 10 minutes) - Scotland 1 (Angus 89 minutes)".

    They can't believe it, he has single handedly got a draw against Scotland!! They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sitting with his head in his hands.

    He refuses to look at them. "I've let you down, I've let you down."

    "Don't be daft, you got a draw against Scotland, all by yourself. And they only scored at the very, very end!"

    "No, No, I have, I've let you down... I got sent off after 12 minutes"
     
    Guest, Jun 28, 2004
    #1
    1. Advertisements

  2. Jeez, is it old joke day or summat?

    --
    Adie
    (replace spam with nickname to reply)

    UKRM FAQ: http://www.ukrm.net/faq/

    Triumph 955iSS / GSF600 bandit
    MRO#11 BOTAFOF#7 BOTAFOT#130 DIAABTCOD#17 MIB#24 YTC#16 BOB#15 ex-UKRMMA#22
     
    Adrienne M Jenn, Jun 28, 2004
    #2
    1. Advertisements

  3. Guest

    Champ Guest

    <snip>

    It's crap, it's old, and the line length was way too long.

    Could you be any more annoying?
     
    Champ, Jun 28, 2004
    #3
  4. Guest

    Ace Guest

    Oh now we know the answer to that one, don't we children?

    This is only mildly irritating, all things considered.
     
    Ace, Jun 28, 2004
    #4
  5. Guest

    porl Guest

    Des, a troll? What an accusation!
     
    porl, Jun 28, 2004
    #5
  6. Guest

    Ben Blaney Guest

    I think he's being quite normal, by his own extremely mad standards.
     
    Ben Blaney, Jun 28, 2004
    #6
  7. Guest

    flash@work Guest

    Can't be a troll, otherwise everyone would just ignore him.
     
    flash@work, Jun 28, 2004
    #7
  8. Guest

    Ace Guest

    As if I'd say such a thing!
     
    Ace, Jun 28, 2004
    #8
  9. Guest

    porl Guest

    " "
     
    porl, Jun 28, 2004
    #9
  10. Guest

    Klaatu Guest

    He could be French.
     
    Klaatu, Jun 28, 2004
    #10
  11. Guest

    Logorrhea Guest

    I've recently discovered that I can become French by marriage. Given that
    Blunkettization is making it increasingly unpleasant to be British, and many
    French [and other mainland continentals] regard Britain as an amenable place
    for an ex-pat in terms of tax and so on, it may well turn out to be a handy
    escape-clause. Not so handy is the fact that, for the purposes of the
    European show-ponies kicking an inflated pig's bladder competition, I
    declared my support for the Greeks [ as reliable no-hopers]. Wife and
    children pretend to be deeply offended by this!

    Logorrhée
    http://www.med.univ-rennes1.fr/iidris/cache/fr/31/3184
     
    Logorrhea, Jun 28, 2004
    #11
  12. Snip sigs, newbie.
     
    Mr. Fantastic, Jun 28, 2004
    #12
  13. Guest

    Ben Blaney Guest

    It's a little demoralising, sure. I don't think it's detracts in any
    substantial way from the experience of being British.
    Don't we cover this every few weeks? The UK has one of the lowest
    tax-takes in Europe, hasn't it?
     
    Ben Blaney, Jun 28, 2004
    #13
  14. Guest

    Pip Guest

    Well, that's one bite.
    And there's another.

    Looking good for the weekend, Champ ;-)
     
    Pip, Jun 28, 2004
    #14
  15. Guest

    platypus Guest

    Well, I thought it was funny.

    Slightly funny.
     
    platypus, Jun 28, 2004
    #15
  16. Guest

    Logorrhea Guest

    No, it's just something to hold in the back pocket while Britain gets
    increasingly sclerotic and authoritarian, and it's comforting to know that
    one has the option. Otherwise, to opt to become French, if you didn't have
    to, really would be giving up on life -

    Wouldn't it, Des ;-)
     
    Logorrhea, Jun 28, 2004
    #16
  17. Guest

    Cab Guest

    Logorrhea bored us all completely to death with wittery prose along the
    lines of:
    Anything over two years of marriage. Takes time though. This could be
    quite handy, should the UK ever leave the EU. :) Mind you, I'm not
    sure that your SWMBO could become British.
    ^^^^^^
    Are you actually there?

    --
    Cab :^) - almost as fast as G.i.n.g.e.
    GSX 1400 - 'Tarts Handbag' (tm) Bike, dead 550/4 Rat
    UKRMMA#10 (KoTL), IbW#015, Bob#4, POTM#3

    P.S. Remove your_head from the cab. ICQ: 83023471
     
    Cab, Jun 29, 2004
    #17
  18. Guest

    Logorrhea Guest

    No. I just found the bi/tri-lingual definition for a laugh. Also my
    carefully-inserted acute accent got scrambled into an 'i'!
     
    Logorrhea, Jun 29, 2004
    #18
  19. Guest

    Logorrhea Guest

    This one has to be knocked on the head. The final recourse is not to the
    House of Lords sitting and snoring in Parliament, but to a panel of 5 Law
    Lords, each of them right at the top of the legal profession. Now, there's
    plenty of opportunity for deriding these [occasionally] blinkered and
    unworldly old coots, but they are - or, at least, were - very highly-trained
    and experienced legal minds whose job is to interpret the law.
    This is very much what the HoL can do, and does.
    You have every right to remain silent, but now a jury can take account of
    that silence rather than be obliged to ignore it. This was introduced
    primarily to forestall the traditional practice of producing a surprise
    alibi in court, having had months to tune it up - and denying the
    prosecution the chance to investigate and discredit it.
    "Had to"? Not such a free country, after all, then ;-)
     
    Logorrhea, Jun 29, 2004
    #19
  20. Guest

    Ace Guest

    You say that like it's a bad thing. I'd much rather have the law
    interpreted by a panel of top judges who are appointed based on years
    of experience and perceived wisdom than some oik who happens to be
    able to twist the electorate around his little finger.
     
    Ace, Jun 29, 2004
    #20
    1. Advertisements

Ask a Question

Want to reply to this thread or ask your own question?

You'll need to choose a username for the site, which only take a couple of moments (here). After that, you can post your question and our members will help you out.