Nicked-ish

Bollox. Just got nicked for going through an orange light on the bike,
whilst nipping back home. 22 euro fine, so only about £13. It wasn't on
the spot, but I either have to pay by cheque, or I need to go to a
tobbaconist (or tax office) to buy "fine" stamps.

Could have been worse. He could have done me for going through on red,
in which case the fine would have been 90 euros (£60) and three points
off my licence. In which case, I would have had to change my UK licence
for a French one.

It's still annoying that the Police don't know about the fact that Euro
licences are valid throughout Europe AND that the préfectures will no
longer change Euro licences for French ones.

The other amusing thing was, that Police, wherever you go in in the
world, always act the same. "Do you know why I stopped you, Sir?" seems
to be an international phrase, translated into the relevant country's
language.

 

"Who does vous think vous are? Christian Sarron?"

 

<Des mode>

Well, strictly speaking, it isn't, because you're Cab and hence wrong.
I got fined last week for running a red on the R1 and I told the
copper what nicked me that if he couldn't quote the correct law
then I was going to take him, and his boss, and his boss's boss
to court for stopping me 15 seconds too late. He didn't say
"do you know why I stopped you", and so I told him that he
should have quote law # ...

<fades to distance>

 

Thats because quite frequently motorists with a guilty conscience will
confess to an entirely unrelated offence.
--
Alex

"I laugh in the face of danger"
"Then I hide until it goes away"

www.drzoidberg.co.uk
www.upce.org.uk

 

lol

 

Remind me - who was it that was skittled in France by a driver who was
running a red?

 

True conversation with 2 traffic bods when I called after I came off to
tell them about the oil I hit on the exit of the roundabout:

Bod1: Nothing we can do here really - we've asked the council to come
and put something on the oil and nobody else is involved.

Bod2: (looking at loose and wobbly road sign and smiling) Did you do this?

Me: No. It was like that when I got here.

Bod2: OK. (to other bod) Lets see if there is anything else we can fit
him up for (said in a spirit of jocularity and not me accusing him of
trying to actually fit me up)

Bod1: Do you know anything about a horse called Shergar?

Me: OK. You got me. I've got him in my garden shed, and the money from
the train robbery is on that pannier. Those big pound notes are a bugger
to use in Tescos.

Actually true (the conversation, not the bits about Shergar and the
train robbery)

 

Jeez. Will you pull your neck in?

No wonder you feel so downtrodden if you can't tell the difference
between a piece of humour and a piece of vitrolic rant. (Just so that
this can be learning experience for you, it's the former).

 

Heh, I know. Now I'm off to the station to be charged with four counts
of armed robbery and one of offensive behaviour to a chicken.

 

B'groff.

 

Mike left a note on my windscreen which said:

How long were you in the nick for while they investigated?

 

TOG@toil, ,

I was stopped in a very ratty Mini a few years ago - one I'd bought
for 25 quid and applied a can of WD40 to. I was on my optimistic way
to MOT it when an observant traffic copper spotted the "naked
windscreen" - no tax disc, see.

So, anyway - he pulls a U-turn, then pulls me. "What do you think
you're doing with this?" he asks, eyeing the several years' worth of
accumulated cobwebs (and their associated dessicated spiders)
infesting the POS. "Do us a favour, Hofficer", I responded, "I've
just brought this one back from the dead".

"Back from the dead? It's still on life support, innit?" was the
merry rejoinder. Funny ****. It passed anyway, so yarboosucks to
him.

 

I got pulled on my matt black z650, which was near death after being
dispathed on for a while. He walked round it, then looked at me and
said "Tell me, do you get pulled over a lot?"

 

Champ

And your reply? "Not so much over!" ?

 

Okay I'll get the ball rolling -

Did you tell it to cluck off?

 

It was somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the

You didn't tell him about the arm in the other pannier?

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19 COSOC#10

 

It was somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the
drugs began to take hold. I remember TOG@toil,

Copper on inspecting my first motoring shitheap and spotting the lack of
offside front sill...

"What's this for? Foot signals?"

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19 COSOC#10

 

My first shitheap, a "white" MkII Escort Estate with black hammerite
splodged over the numerous rust spots and red primer joining them up and
with sills rusted through to nigh concertina-provoking levels, caused me a
similar experience. "What shall we do him for?", said one. "Nothing, I think
he's got enough problems as it is".

They were talking about the car, I'm sure of it.

 

No - there was no 'arm in it.

 

left a note on my windscreen which said:

Any nuggets of info on the offense in question?