Near death experiences are not funny, honest.

Hopefully by now you're getting good news but, if not, then it's only
one more to go before you can claim your inheritance.

It's a half empty - half full thing.

 

You can **** *right* off on the inheritance front. OK? I'm sure you
meant it to be funny, now let's move on.

As for good news, I won't really know much until Tuesday, they take a
few days to see how a heart attack patient is progressing. Fingers
crossed though.

 

The life change stuff seems to have hit already, hospitals these days
give the patients a "tick the boxes" type menu every day. He'd totally
ignored the roast beef sunday lunch, in lieu of something healthy
sounding.

I took the piss, as I felt it my duty.

As for the finance side, no way, that's his, and my mum's. To be honest
I'm more likely to support them in the future if the need arises. Dad
never earnt a lot doing joinery for 47 years... if there's any left
over, then when that day comes (and I hope it's a long way away) my
sister can have it.

 

_Ginge wrote

If he is true to himself it won't last.

I managed to go three months and then I just *had* to have a bacon
sandwich. I simply didn't give a flying **** about the consequences,
nor do I now. I shall eat bacon butties as and when I want. I have
been back on butter, albeit the watered down cold spreadable type, for a
year now and full fat milk (*wahayyyyyy*) since the boy left home a
couple of months back. And it is staying that way.

Good move.

 

_Ginge wrote

The way they explained it to me is that they look for bits of dead heart
in your piss the day after and work out from there how much has survived
intact.

 

It may not take him too long, he tried flora yesterday for the first
time in his life.

"If I die tomorrow, I'm having butter on my bread." was his conclusion.

 

I sense you're taking a stand against something here but I can't work out
what the hell it is.

 

A functional circulatory system.

 

Porl wrote

If you are lucky enough to walk out of an intensive cardio unit they
don't actually let you go without trained mind manipulators ripping your
previously cherished lifestyle to pieces and implanting subtle hypnotic
cues about improving it.

Once the initial panic has worn off you do start making decisions
differently.

 

It was somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the
drugs began to take hold. I remember steve auvache

In contrast, the pains I had a couple of years ago were classic
coronary; turned out it was just a pulled muscle through lifting a
welder stupidly.

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19 COSOC#10

 

SNIP

Hope it all works out Rob, parents really are a worry BTDTGTTS.

 

Next time, kick the **** and tell him to move.

 

Sometimes a little dark humour helps, sometimes not.

Indeed.

 

I knew where you were going.. don't sweat it, chief.

 

Well, GWS to your Dad and take care to you...

I have a horsey friend who phones her vet first for virtually
everything - says she gets much better treatment (stitches etc)..

 

Chicks eh? They're so confusing, etc.

 

"You reckon you've got indigestion? Pah. Wait til you have a heart
attack^W^Wbaby, then you'll know what pain is."

Just as well we don't have a woman running the country, iyam.

 

Only I can. My dad is as stubborn as me.

 

Cheer up you miserable fucker or I'll <insert idle threat of choice
here>

 

Bear says...

Not to worry, no fucker ever does.

I'm not here for your entertainment, you're all here for mine.