Makeover: Better than expected.

Molly · Feb 19, 2007

Tosspot said:

Molly said:

On Sun, 18 Feb 2007 18:58:02 +0000, steve auvache

The red black and silver, all hamerite?

Hamerite (hay-mer-ite [ursine: haymer-never-right]) occurs in many
colours - frequently black, rarely silver and occasionally in a deep
red flush; similar in many respects to Hematite. It is, of course,
the ore from which such useful minerals as nimbyismus and occasionally
deep-rooted fuckwitterite can be extracted, as can the piss on a
frequent basis.

Its origins are apparently variable and not enough is known to give a
conclusive answer, but it is generally accepted to be of Mancuvician
or pseudo-Celtiferic origin.

Hamerite is part of a complex solid solution oxyhydoxide system having
various degrees of extractable water, hydroxyl group, and vacancy
substitutions that affect the mineral's magnetic and crystal chemical
properties.

Hamerite is, in fact, the source of much of today's vacancy, a
property cherished by the current chav population. Hamerite is most
unusual in the properties attributed to its magnetic polarity in that
it appears to repel all but a very small number of other minerals.

Two other end-members are referred to as protohamerite and
hydrohamerite. Fortunately due to hamerite rarely successfully
getting its end away, protohamerite is unknown outside the laboratory
and is only theoretical at present. Hydrohamerite is very common and
the water is very easy to extract.

The best-known use of hamerite is in the heat-resistant and
drag-mimimising (due to ithe self-lubricating properties of its
ever-present wetness) coating applied to the nosecones of all
devastatingly quick cross-country missiles. These missiles, once
common around the byways, have in recent years sadly fallen into
disuse due to driveway seizures while idling and are now generally
consigned to sad and lonley existences in the backs of garages,
supported only by their substantial chicken strips.
Click to expand...

I love it when you talk dirty.
Click to expand...

You're one to talk! "Stripped, laid bare and covered with Hammerite".

Worse than Marmite and a Labrador.
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What colour Labrador?

Pip · Feb 19, 2007

What colour Labrador?
Click to expand...

Marmite coloured by the end, obviously.

Krusty · Feb 19, 2007

Pip said:

You clumsy ****. Kicking is not a good idea, the potential (as you
proved) for pain is too gret. Not to mention the chance of kicking
the bar off the socket, the socket off the nut or rounding the nut
off. I meant that you should keep a steady pressure on the bar with
one foot, stand up on it and then BOUNCE on it.
Click to expand...

Well yes, but unfortunately I haven't mastered the art of standing on
things whilst laying horizontally under a car.

With a long enough bar and some wiggling, even behind the suspension
as you were, I've usually managed to get enough of the bar available
to exert some pressure.
Click to expand...

Not on a 'vette I'll wager. The rear wheels are about 20 feet from the
back of the car (& 150 from the front - give or take).

In extremis, jack the car up high, get the
bar on the nut and wedge the end of the bar on the floor - then let
the jack down gradually. The weight of the car squeezing a metre of
bar forces most fasteners to cry enough.
Click to expand...

I did contemplate that method, but then spotted the scissors jack
jumping around the garage, handle raised in the air shouting "use me!
use me!" I didn't have the heart to reject the little fella.

That's the place of rounded-off nuts and sheared-off bolts, that is.
Dremel and wire wheel/brush is the way forward, as is buying shares in
Plus-Gas and a blowtorch.
Click to expand...

Aye, I emptied two cans of PlusGas when I first got the car here,
spraying every bolt in sight. I'm hoping it'll help come suspension
replacement time. The blowtorch has also seen sterling service, not
least of which was during the dreaded 'brake hub removal' task. The
left side came off ok, but t'other side was still rivetted to the hub,
meaning it hadn't been removed. Ever. 25 years worth of cack isn't a
pretty sight.

You're a fucking menace. An old pair of welder's gauntlets are the
answer here, or even SWMBO's gardening gloves if you can get your
manly mitts in 'em. Cor, the yoof of today. You'll be as scarred and
crippled as me when you get old.
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<hangs head in shame>

<small voice>

The welding gauntlets were in the kitchen, mainly because the oven
gloves were in the garage[1], & I couldn't be arsed to go fetch them.

</sv>

[1] I couldn't find the welding gloves when I needed to fondle a hot
exhaust, so I stole the oven gloves, then lost them, then found the
welding gloves, etc etc; you get the picture.

--
Krusty
www.MuddyStuff.co.uk
Off-Road Classifieds

'02 MV Senna '03 Tiger 955i '96 Tiger '79 Fantic Hiro 250

Krusty · Feb 20, 2007

Champ said:

suspension >> as you were, I've usually managed to get enough of the
bar available >> to exert some pressure.

**** me. I knew yank cars were big, but I had no idea.
Click to expand...

It's a beast alright. What's more you can only see the first half inch
of the bonnet when driving it, so parking's a laugh a minute. That's a
small price to pay for its knicker-dropping capability though.

--
Krusty
www.MuddyStuff.co.uk
Off-Road Classifieds

'02 MV Senna '03 Tiger 955i '96 Tiger '79 Fantic Hiro 250

Molly · Feb 21, 2007

Pip said:

Marmite coloured by the end, obviously.
Click to expand...

heh

Pip · Feb 21, 2007

Just how many girls can you get in a car that's 170 feet long?
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Depends how you stack 'em. Head to tail works best.

Krusty · Feb 21, 2007

Champ said:

Just how many girls can you get in a car that's 170 feet long?
Click to expand...

Very few as most of the footage is full of oily bits. The cabin's only
about 7 cubic feet. Now if you asked 'how many girls can you get on the
bonnet of a car that's 170 feet long', the answer would be 'many'.

--
Krusty
www.MuddyStuff.co.uk
Off-Road Classifieds

'02 MV Senna '03 Tiger 955i '96 Tiger '79 Fantic Hiro 250

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Well, that was slightly harder than I expected

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Want to reply to this thread or ask your own question?

The NSW EPA gets better and better

Better than Ebay-Bankruptcy sale in Italy 1,188 MotorcyclesThis "Po

<fx: wakes up somewhere other than where expected to wake up>

Well, that was slightly harder than I expected

Well, I enjoyed that much more than I expected...

About 17 years sooner than expected...

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