(Long) Top tips for a lap of Spain

1. Spain is bigger than you think. At least it is if your only
pre trip route planning consists of little more than noting a few
recommended road numbers and a declaration that "we'll go
anti-clockwise".

2. Do not pop to the Post Office on the day of departure
expecting to fill in a E111 form and get it stamped like the last time
you went abroad, because they don’t do it like that anymore. You can
apply online to speed the process up, but your card still won’t arrive
within six hours. Also be aware that continental breakdown cover is a
pain to get if your bike is over 10 years old, and that a lot of
standard travel insurance policies count motorcycling as a hazardous
activity and don’t cover you. Practice shrugging.

3. Do not think that because most of the wear limit indicators
are still visible on your back tyre at the start of the trip it will
be fine. 3000 miles, two overweight passengers and luggage will soon
make the bits of rubber go away.

4. Do not assume that you will easily grab a room for the night
in Northern Spain on a Sunday. In particular, the Sunday before Labour
Day holiday, because you won't. Doing a detour to on or two large-ish
towns won't help and neither will trying every little place towards
Portugal.

5. Northern Spain does not constantly smell of mint. Do not waste
time repeatedly pondering this phenomenon, because next morning you
will realise that in your bleary-eyed state induced by 4 hours sleep
and the ferry docking at the ridiculous time of 7am, you had a shave
using toothpaste, rather than shaving gel.

6. Do not be alarmed when the only other people you see in a 24
hour cafe near the border with Portugal are five or six uniformed
members of the Guardia Civil necking beer - it will help take their
attention away from some foreigners getting a couple of hours kip on a
pallet round the back.

7. A Spanish phrase book is no use in Portugal. Mid-Portugal
will also seem to be closed at this point in time, but the empty roads
give you ample time to look at lots and lots of stumpy little trees.
Rejoice at the hotel having wifi, and fire up your ipaq, before
finding out that your ipaq browser cant handle web pages that actually
do anything - like hotel booking pages for instance.

8. Seville is a shit hole. When deciding to get out the place
and head to Jerez / Cadiz do not assume that just because you pay to
use the motorway that this means that you can go as fast as you like
without interference from the Police, because it doesn't. Do present
your papers quickly to the nice policeman, as this at least takes his
attention away from your back tyre.

9. Algeciras is a shit hole - at least in the evening. Ferries to
Africa are far more frequent, as well as cheaper from here than from
Gibraltar, but at Gibraltar port you won't get a variety of colourful
characters wanting to look after your bike or escort you to a ticket
office down an alley.

10. Gibraltar has a "nature park" thing at the top of the rock,
but be aware that after you pay extra to take your vehicle up you are
still prohibited from driving up the top two or three roads to the top
station. Gibraltar also has cheap petrol @ 57p a litre (not too much
consequence on a bike) and cheap fags @ £10 for 200 Bensons (a
significant consequence if you have 2 cargo nets handy).

11. Just because Gibraltar is UK affiliated and you have a UK
passport and the UK is in the EU, this does not mean that the UK
"acceptable personal allowance" of a few thousand ciggies will apply
when you re-enter Spain, because it doesn't - you are limited to 200
per person. It would help if you knew this *before* cargo netting a
quantity of freshly purchased tobacco products onto any available
space on your bike. Furthermore, you would probably be less
conspicuous going back into Spain if you noticed that all the bikes
and scooters were nipping through a gap in the barrier and didn't end
up as the only bike in the four lane queue of cars waiting to cross
the border.

12. If your ipaq can't handle hotel booking pages, don't keep
wasting money on hotel wifi access in Spain (Telefonica) or France
(Orange) because instead of the little card giving you numbers to put
into your connection settings like it did in Portugal, you will need
to put your username and password into an easy to use web page - which
your ipaq can't handle. Begin to wish you had brought your laptop, or
a plan.

13. If your bike has a 500 RPM flat spot under normal conditions,
do not be alarmed when this grows to a 2000 RPM flat spot when you are
chugging around in the Sierra Nevada mountains. It's probably
something to do with the air being thinner and colder at 8000 feet,
because it goes back to normal when you get down to a more
sensible altitude.

14. Do not assume that all twisty scenic roads have a lovely road
surface, because they don’t. Some are OK, some are bumpy as hell,
some have been repaired with the back of a shovel rather than a road
roller, and some are being completely resurfaced and consist of
nothing but road stone for 15Km.

15. Barcelona is bigger than you think, and the Sagrada Familiar
looks less impressive when playing host to a load of scaffolding and
there are half a dozen cranes towering above it. Similarly the Magic
Fountain is less photogenic when it's turned off.

16. The N152 road from Ripoll to Urtx is terrific - scenic, loads
of twisties and a nice smooth surface. After completely losing the use
of your back brake three quarters of the way along (probably this
"brake fade" of which I have heard, or riding like a PFF as some would
say) you can then go on to ponder if the juddering from the front
brake is indeed a warped disk or not.

17. Lourdes is Tacky Central.

18. When going up the Col du Tormalet do not be put off by the
"ferme" signs and the barrier across the road 5 Km from the top,
thinking it's probably only some rocks and the odd bit of snow and
that the road is really only closed for cars but navigable by bike.
You get to see a nice JCB, a nicer snow plough and a awesome snow
blower in action, and eventually do get to the top. But not down the
other side.

19. When getting off the boat at Portsmouth learn that although
you got your passport at the same time as your small child, theirs
only lasts for five years and expired several months ago. Be relieved
that this comes to light back on UK soil and muse how much more fun
this would have been had it been noticed elsewhere, in particular such
as when on getting on the ferry on day one, or indeed if you had
decided to catch the boat to Morocco.

HTH, HAND etc.

 

This is what happened when we went:
http://www.horrible.demon.co.uk/bareges2000/20.jpg

 

Heh. This is a major ski run between December and April, so I'm not
surprised at all.

 

Bear said...

It's just because Champ was on a K1 Gixer thou, and everyone knows
that's God's own choice of sports bike, when he's not trying to start
his Hardly.

 

Oh sure, it was more that I could hear Champ's bike was still pulling
cleanly, whereas mine was needing a lot more throttle & revs, and was
popping like a bastard on the overrun too. Only happened when it was
quite high up, mind.[/QUOTE]

Simian's already over-fueled 7R, with the flatslides and the trail of
unburnt fuel you could smell (literally) a mile behind was quite
amusing to ride over the Col de la Bonnette, apparently. ISTR it was
fine as long as you kept the motor between 8500 and 9000 rpm, or
something like that.

--
_______
..'_/_|_\_'. Ace (brucedotrogers a.t rochedotcom)
\`\ | /`/ GSX-R1000K3
`\\ | //' BOTAFOT#3, SbS#2, UKRMMA#13, DFV#8, SKA#2
`\|/`
`

 

<fx: considers trip to NEC a few years back>

accept this prize:

UKRM poster most likely to be left for dead in some unforgiving
arsehole-of-nowhere or - worse - Newport Pagnell Services.

 

Hey, that's my back yard you're talking about.

You should have popped in for a beer.

--

Paul.
CBR1100XX SuperBlackbird
BOTAFOT #4
BOTAFOF #30
MRO #24
OMF #15
UKRMMA #30
Buy this house: http://personales.ya.com/wibbleypants/main.htm
This will be ready soon:
http://personales.ya.com/wibbleypants/bb_in_andalucia_spain.htm

 

He seemed to quite enjoy it, akcherly. We did stop for a 'rest' just
before the top, mind. Oh, his head bearings were utterly fucked too,
although he hadn't noticed until I pointed it out, after wheeling it
out of my garage. Doesn't like to make things too easy for himself,
does our Simon.

There's a blue plaque at the side of the road now...

--
_______
..'_/_|_\_'. Ace (brucedotrogers a.t rochedotcom)
\`\ | /`/ GSX-R1000K3
`\\ | //' BOTAFOT#3, SbS#2, UKRMMA#13, DFV#8, SKA#2
`\|/`
`

 

Didn't realise you were still running it.

<fx:consults ebay>

Looking a bit nicer now, with a properly-fitting fairing. And without
your, err, 'interesting' last-minute paint job. But it definitely had
character. Still not got a matching seat unit, I notice.

--
_______
..'_/_|_\_'. Ace (brucedotrogers a.t rochedotcom)
\`\ | /`/ GSX-R1000K3
`\\ | //' BOTAFOT#3, SbS#2, UKRMMA#13, DFV#8, SKA#2
`\|/`
`

 

Aye, that about sums it up. But some of the roads we'd done earlier in
the day were, quite literally, 'gorgeous'.

--
_______
..'_/_|_\_'. Ace (brucedotrogers a.t rochedotcom)
\`\ | /`/ GSX-R1000K3
`\\ | //' BOTAFOT#3, SbS#2, UKRMMA#13, DFV#8, SKA#2
`\|/`
`

 

Ah, but I don't drink like that anymore, so it's unlikely to happen.

At least, unlikely to happen *like that*[/QUOTE]

thank heavens for small mercies

 

But it's _blue_. a) the wrong colour and b) not the same as the
mudguards, tank and top fairing. Were they really made that way?

<googles>

Oh. I see they were. Wierd.

--
_______
..'_/_|_\_'. Ace (brucedotrogers a.t rochedotcom)
\`\ | /`/ GSX-R1000K3
`\\ | //' BOTAFOT#3, SbS#2, UKRMMA#13, DFV#8, SKA#2
`\|/`
`

 

That reminds me. Ruddles o'clock.

 

Been Crémant heure for a while now...

--
_______
..'_/_|_\_'. Ace (brucedotrogers a.t rochedotcom)
\`\ | /`/ GSX-R1000K3
`\\ | //' BOTAFOT#3, SbS#2, UKRMMA#13, DFV#8, SKA#2
`\|/`
`

 

It was Kronenbourg o'clock for me on the 6.36 from Paddington (sure-fire
way to keep the seat next to you empty: neck lager on the commuter
express while reading a bike mag and Sam Adams o'clock as soon as I got
home.

It's the only way to get through the hell that is Clearing Up The Spare
Room.

 

Bear said...

I knew a Sam Adams, short for Samantha it was. She was fucking stunning.

 

Most of it. A job that big takes days.

 

They're more purple than blue, but for some reason they come out the
wrong colour in photos, eg.
http://www.pre.org/verdun05/slides/IMGP0229.JPG

 

Likewise my old Fireblade - the other 3 I was with were all on FI bikes
and were wondering why I was having trouble keeping up - and also why I
was keepeing my revs above 5000 RPM all the time (the engine would die
if I let the revs drop lower!)

Phil

 

That would knock out 1 of many ways I suppose..

Phil