How to keep the man in Halfords amused for ages...

Gyp: "I'd like to buy a 3/8 Allen socket please"
Halfords bloke: "Yes sir, what size would you like?"
Gyp: "3/8"
Halfords bloke: "Yes sir, I know you want a 3/8 one, but what size would
you like?"
Gyp: "3/8"
(repeat to fade)

Perhaps you had to be there

 

I was in Cannotafords this week and couldn't believe how expensive they are.

 

Gyp scribbled:

Maybe he meant length of socket, or the size of the square hole?

 

I presume the clever man from Halfords wanted to know the size of the
other end.

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, frag amazed us all with this pearl of wisdom:

The size of the square hole would be 3/8, no?

 

I don't get it.
Maybe he was asking what size *drive* you wanted; 1/4", 3/8", 1/2", 1".
Maybe he was asking what depth you wanted?
Maybe you should have been a bit more specific.

Obviously.

 

Bear scribbled:

<fx : takes bow>

 

Bear scribbled:

Perhaps some of us thought Gyps post just wasn't that funny?

 

I know what a 3/8" Allen key is, but *what* is an Allen socket, or do they
make sockets as Snap-On etc. do?

Martin.

 

Oily came up with the following;:

It's an Allen 'key' but made up as a socket to go on a ratchet etc.

 

It's a stubby Allen key on a 3/8ths drive carrier with a square hole.

 

Often referred to as hex bit sockets.

 

Those are the ones! Didn't click at first, must be the Alzheimers coming
on.

I suppose after all the laughs reading these posts its got to be my turn
sometime. Cheers

Martin

 

Colleague at work "celebrated" 25 years today[1] - some other
time-server dragged in a photo of the whole department, taken in 1983.

"who's that skinny twat at the back?"

"That's me", I said - to much amusement. But it was.

<sob>

[1] new "initiative" - official celebration of career milestones -
little buffet, drinkies, embarrassing speeches by management, etc.

Mine's in three weeks. It's a pity that I'll be in France.
--
| ___ Salad Dodger
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'^' RBR Clues: 29 Pts: 485 Miles: 1967

 

You could go in, ask if they do Whitworth and wait for the reply "we
don't stock that brand".

 

I'd call that a hex driver.

 

I was lucky then. No embarassing gathering of colleagues while some
junior manager who struggles to remember your name tries to think of
something nice to say about you. Just an exchange of letters with HR
and I got a rather nice lump sum which I could choose to use to buy
some more company shares (as if) or to get a memento to remember them
by. So, I chose to get a rather spiffy Sat-Nav unit

 

No, one size fits all: "Bitte, ein Englander!"

--
Ivan Reid, Electronic & Computer Engineering, ___ CMS Collaboration,
Brunel University. Ivan.Reid@[brunel.ac.uk|cern.ch] Room 40-1-B12, CERN
GSX600F, RG250WD, DT175MX "You Porsche. Me pass!" DoD #484 JKLO# 003, 005
WP7# 3000 LC Unit #2368 (tinlc) UKMC#00009 BOTAFOT#16 UKRMMA#7 (Hon)
KotPT -- "for stupidity above and beyond the call of duty".

 

Speak for yourself grandad.

I've never owned an imperial spanner, and never plan to.

 

They're not usually so dogmatic and are quite happy to ask for a 12mm
socket for a 3/8" drive. Not really an issue, as the drive size is
completely arbitrary anyway.

Also for plumbing, so most pipework junctions, valves, taps etc are
1/2" fittings too, although somewhat confusingly the pipes themselves
are available in 12, 14, 16 and 20mm. IIRC (and I always have to
check) it's the 14mm that fits the 1/2" stuff, as it's measured
externally rather than internally.

--
_______
..'_/_|_\_'. Ace (brucedotrogers a.t rochedotcom)
\`\ | /`/ GSX-R1000K3
`\\ | //' BOTAFOT#3, SbS#2, UKRMMA#13, DFV#8, SKA#2
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