Gyp's Tips - No 8 in a series of 4

Never electrocute yourself. If fucking hertz.

Light fitting was getting in the way so I went about shifting it. The
very cute young lady was most impressed as I jumped up on the stool to
remove the lamp shade but did not look quite as impressed as I dangled
from said light fitting shouting something not dissimilar to
"Aaaaghahahghghaahhahghahhcuntingbastardfuckingwanker" and landed in a
heap on the floor.

Ho hum.

 

Did you smolder gently? Girls like that.

 

Just be grateful you had the opportunity to let go 50 times a second.

 

Rope wrote

When I were an apprentice doing me rounds an old fella from EL&P told me
that a circuit is always to be considered live unless you have
previously removed the fuse and put it in your pocket.

 

Hahahahahahaahahaha!

Did it give you a stiffy the way it does when you hang yourself?

 

Previously on ukrm, steve auvache said...

Exactly what I was told too, when I was an apprentice sparks.

 

Hmm, I knew an old chap used to check if light circuits were live by
jamming his thump in the socket and getting someone else to flick the
switch.

Mind you, he also used to push the burning tobacco in his pipe bowl
about with the same thumb so I'm guessing his skin resistance was pretty
high...

 

I don't know. I'll have to go hang myself to compare the two.

 

Please, tell him no, you might save a life...

 

Don't forget to report back.

 

You think I haven't tried both?

 

I offer no opinion on that matter. You seem to have intimate knowledge of
the original poster hanging himself, and I am a little alarmed by your
curiosity concerning the effects of his near electrocution. I would
recommend, for safety's sake, that you insulate yourself with rubber gloves
should you need to "help him down" from any such situation.

HTH

 

No need to be alarmed about my being curious; I'm an Engineer(ing
Manager).

And regarding safety... pah! where's the fun in that?

 

Quite right too. My earliest experience of that was as a lad of fifteen,
when I was wiring up an extra lightswitch in my folk's house. My
dumbfuck brother, pissed off because his radio wasn't working, came down
the stairs and switched the fusebox back on.

The ****.

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19

 

OUch.

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19

 

Seriously, hanging (reportedly) involves not just a stiffy but full-on
ejaculation. Use the rubber gloves.

 

"Ye'll have one afore ye go?"

 

If you've got the rubber gloves on, big boy, go for it.

 

Baby oil or swarfega?

 

The latter, of course. How could there be any question?