Good Intentions....

This was just forwarded to me by one of our most senior bods in the
corporation. Probably a Ginge, but made I larf.


A man appears before St. Peter at the pearly gates. "Have you ever done
anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asks.

"Well, I can think of one thing," the man offers. "Once, on a trip to
the Black Hills, out in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of
high-testosterone bikers who were threatening a young woman. I
directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So, I
approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker. I smacked him
on the head, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring and threw
it on the ground, then told him, "Leave her alone now or you'll answer
to me."
St. Peter was impressed. "When did this happen?"

"Just a couple of minutes ago."

 

"Yes" says the man. "I can remember lots of really old jokes"

"Let's hear one then"

George Bush met The Queen, and he turns round and says:

"As I'm the President, I'm thinking of changing how the country is
referred to, and I'm thinking that it should be a Kingdom." To which
the Queen replies, "I'm sorry Mr Bush, but to be a Kingdom, you have to
have a King in charge - and you're not a King."

George Bush thought a while and then said: "How about a Principality
then?" to which the Queen replied, "Again, to be a Principality you have
to be a Prince - and you're not a Prince, Mr Bush."

Bush thought long and hard and came up with, "How about an Empire then?"

The Queen, getting a little peed off by now replied, " Sorry again, Mr
Bush, but to be an Empire you must have an Emperor in charge - and you
are not an Emperor."

Before George Bush could utter another word, The Queen said: "I think
you're doing quite nicely as a Country."

 

<snip ginge>

Indeed this is defintely a 2nd generation ginge, and quite recent iirc.

I thought it was bloody funny though.

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Doesnotcompute said:

That's good. Made oi larf anne awl.

 

"Well, I can think of one thing," the man offers. "Once, I was a regular
poster on UKRM, when suddenly the rate of posting dropped off sharply.
Champ
directed the group to produce some entertaining content, but they wouldn't
listen. So, I approached the group and posted a lame joke that everyone had
heard at least a hundred times. It was so awful that it smacked the readers
about the head, and was as painful as somebody ripping out a nose ring. I
was then told that it was almost certainly a *GINGE*.

 

Is this a request for me to post more? am I no longer worthy to be
consdiered a regular?

<fx: sniff>

 

I made the assumption that should a person stand at the pearly gates, they
would no longer be able to post to the newsgroups as they haven't got
broadband in heaven yet.

 

....and Robbo as technical support.

 

They haven't? Sheesh, my new on-line Ouija board service isn't going to
be
much cop then (

 

Slider wrote

Fucking BT. I fucking hate them.

 

It's NT Hell

 

You are not alone.

"BT Broadband tops complaint table"
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/3284529.stm

 

Hella yeah

 

Pikeys.