French Run - new venue

it must be a little bit hard to get it at all.

 

Let me rephrase.

Waiting until you are 39 and have a clue. Marrying a cute blonde incredibly
intelligent athletic woman. Having enough money around for the basics.
Living in a non pikey area. Going to schools full of aspirational children.
In this situation, I don't think it's hard to get it right. Throw in a
snap-on tool chest and a few motorbikes and the job's a goodun.

 

i hate that word.

 

There's a world of difference between it being "demanding" and "getting
it right". Irresepective of the prevailing social environment, kids will
want independence, experimentation and any number of unpredictable
things. It is not so demanding (physically more so than mentally) when
they are small - tiring but easier to get "right" - when they develop
into adults is when, IME, it becomes genuinely "demanding".

 

That's why I decided 'yes dear' was the way forward last night, I may
have gone off on one.

I think there will always be some conflict in ideas, it is about how
that is managed. My view is that children need time, not money. My ex
will give lip service to this, but not carry it out and it upsets my
daughter and she's old enough and canny enough to know what he is
doing. I get to deal with the fall out.

Even in the shittiest of circumstances they are few and far between.

Well there is, but you (generic) don't for the reasons below.

<round of applause>

 

Yours is only around 7 though isn't he? It changes hugely when they
are establishing their independance.

 

Get pregnant at 20.

Do I have to marry her?

We were skint when they were tiny, I was at Uni, youngest was born 3
weeks before the start of my final year.

When they were tiny we lived in one of the most deprived wards in the
city.

Don't get me started on their schools.

I think I've got it right, despite none of the above. It's been
fucking hard though.

Mmmm snap on.

*ding* Let's see how Hog feels when his turns into a teenager.

 

"What's in a word"

 

Throw in a few complications and it's not that straightforward.

Wait until your child(ren) are well into their teens and report back.

 

You're probably right here. Add patience hmm... and probably self
control and there are three things short of.

 

I'm not surprised you managed ok anyway.
I was only commenting that it wasn't so hard because I waited and planned.
Yes he is only 7. Obviously as he gets older and starts to push the
boundaries I will pick the little scrote up and kick seven shades of shit
out of him.

 

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 

OK Ok you have rumbled me...

 

But the point is that you don't know whether it's hard or not! You've
seen the first 7 years; wait until he gets older. Wait until the
homework piles up and you spend your evenings chasing the little sod to
make sure he's done his homework and get anger and temper in return for
your care.

And that, my friend, is where you start to **** it up. Physical
aggression from a parent towards an adolescent boy will not help one
iota.

If you're hitting children once they're older than 3 or so all you are
doing is brutalising them; at 3 or younger I don't know if it does any
good. I hit my children but only because I wasn't a good enough parent.

 

I shall take that as a compliment, thank you. If you feel the urge to
go into great detail about my wonderful qualities that have enabled me
to manage OK then that would be appreciated

I didn't want children, mainly because I saw how hard it was.

Heh.

 

Joking aside he has never had anything other than a skelp (other than
sparring), nor will he. I agree completely with you and I have been well in
control of myself for years.

He has been conditioned to acknowledge verbal chastisement but it is never
delivered to demean or overwhelm him.

Think I shall leave the matters of child rearing out of ukrm now thanks.

 

Amen

 

Especially if they've got bikes of their own.....

 

Is it really?

 

I was on the pill! Both Times! It's 98% effective. The kids are 99%
and 100%