FOAK: Serious Questions, regarding mental issues etc.

My killfile is a living thing, people come out after a while.

It's not that I don't like you, or dissagree with everything you have to
say, I just think you're a tosser.

 

Oh my God! I should be really worried, then, should I, in case I
suddenly find myself getting addicted to things?

 

You're making precious little sense, and you seem very tense - it's a
possibility.

 

Durn it ;-)

I was referring to that well-known manufacturer of a range of
motorcycle suspension parts, WP - formerly known as White Power.

 

How do these co-exist?

 

Bit of a cheap shot though isn't it, making reference to motorcycle stuff
and expecting me to get it?

 

I guess you are lucky - I fear, given a straw poll of the people I've known
throughout life, you are in the minority anyway, when it comes to willpower
of this kind.

For me, fruit machines are something that without fail, comes back to haunt
me from time to time - a lot of people including myself don't really
understand this one, as you're not physically taking something to feed the
addiction... it is however, quite a strong one when at its worst - one
afternoon, I sat in front of one machine whilst getting pissed, and pumped
£110 into it - if I won the jackpot, I threw it back in, if I ran out of
coins, I'd stick another £20 in the note slot.

Total for that day, was £180, including the beer, fruit machines etc., and
this really was when I couldn't afford to waste anywhere near that kind of
money

I suffer from depression quite a lot, and it has been explained to me that
gambling in this way is sometimes a way of numbing ourselves to the reality
we're in... the monotinous slotting of coins and pushing of buttons does
seem to mong you out, and it's only when all the money has gone you wake up
to what you've just done, and leave more depressed than when you went in,
vowing never to gamble again... and then a few days later, you deliberately
make sure you gofor lunch in teh pub.

On reflection, I wish at times I had more willpower in this respect - I
admit I am weak, although it has to be said, the heavy days are now gone,
but I admit that of late I've been having the odd flutter a bit more often
than perhaps I should.

I then compare this to drink: I do like one... but normally of a weekend,
and I'll take my weeks worth in one hit, rather than go down the 'wake up to
a lovely cup o' Special Brew', route - in other words, I drink regularly out
of choice, not necessity, and can (and quite often do), leave it by the
wayside without getting any cravings etc.

I guess we all have our strengths and weaknesses... but if I do end up going
on a UKRM trip over the water in the near future, I'd be grateful if I could
be kept away from the fruit machines on the boat... ;-)

 

Well funnily enough, he fell out with someone a few years back, and they
sent some trained ape along who jumped him in the dark by way of coming out
of the darkness and cracking him round the head with a hammer.

And he got back up and grappled it off the bloke, net result he lobbed the
hammer through the miscreants back window as they sped off.

Which is exactly the reason why I know there is no point in trying to beat
sense into him... ;-)

 

I am aware he has recently been hinting at some very unsavoury shit from his
childhood, which may after all this time be coming out, as he's now actively
positive about seeing a counsellor his sister has organised for him.

I will do, if between me and his ex, and / or the counsellor, we can't get
him to want to go himself.

He seems to accept the fact he needs to stop drinking... when he's sober and
in good spirits (no pun intended)

He doesn't really say much about the weed - I suspect that's the one he'd
cling on for, more than the others... it's more the apparent blindness to
how frightening and violent he gets, that bothers me and that I feel will
ultimately be his downfall, be that through death or a life in prison.

10 years is the figure he's given me, for the amount of time he was using
it... he doesn't seem to crave it now, having stayed clean for four months,
but I suspect this is in part due to the excess of booze and weed he's now
doing.

Cheers.

 

I've known him 20 of my coming up for 32 years... never used to be like
this, and we were like brothers when we younger... which I suppose is why
I've tried to persevere up until now, knowing the person he was, and still
is at times, when his mood is right.

 

I'm sorry to hear that... being blood, it's not like you really have the
option to walk away if needs be either really, is it... :-S

This is exactly how I'm starting to feel, as twice in the last week I've
unexpectedly seen the less savoury side of him, with no real warning it was
approaching.

Up until recently, I only saw him lash out at his ex, his sister, and
others, and I seemed to be able to calm him... now I think perhaps in his
head, I am lumped in with everyone else around him.

Sounds exactly like my mate - he was, funnily enough, kicking a door of the
pub last night, as he made after me when I went to leave him to it. Threats
a plenty, I just calmly got back in the car and drove off, because when he's
in that mood, even if you just nodded in agreement with whatever he's
accusing others of, he'd still be acting in a menacing manner - not nice.

Same as, same as... but I reckon even they are starting to get to the end of
their tether!

 

Sorry to hear that. :-(

Can't afford to, even if I wanted to... ;-)

 

JackH wrote

That will be the combination of the booze and the coke. It is quite a
horrible transformation to watch as an evening passes by.

Probably.

As the others have said, it is his move.

 

I can put up with it all... just not the violence.

I hope so, as he's a nice bloke when he's not off on one.

It's not a case of can't be arsed... I genuinely saw a nastier side than
normal last night - I really did think maybe he was going to attack me,
that's the difference.

Aye... well I've spoken to his ex at dinner time - apparently the tears
flowed later in the evening yesterday, as did the talk of suicide... I've
asked her to let him know he can ring me if he wants me to pop up etc., but
if he turns on me again, that's it for the foreseeable.

 

You can't sniff me, your beard will tickle.

 

He's not touched coke for four months though... although 10 years of
persistent abuse doesn't just get out your system overnight just cos you've
stopped, I suspect.

And we think he may have done a load of Speed the other day, which defnitely
won't have helped, but like most addicts, try getting them to openly admit
they've taken something...

 

a temporarily-unwell-file, then?

So killfile me properly then, ffs.

 

.... doesn't agree with this.

Which is the point I made in the post you piggybacked.

That's what I'm saying: I wouldn't get addicted.

 

JackH wrote

Coke is a very peculiar drug, personally I don't see the attraction and
I have had access to plenty of free Dealers Choice in the past. Also,
who among us needs to spend money to turn into a loud mouthed obnoxious
****?

Different buzz all together. Coke is noted for the tremendous boost it
gives to self confidence and feelings of well being without too many of
the "lift the top of your head off" type sensations. Speed gets you
bopping.

It is not so much that they have taken something, more that they have
taken something which affects them badly.

 

I do have more willpower than anyone else I know. It's great when it
comes to drinking, and smoking and taking drugs, but it's a bit of a
**** in other ways.

I've been a pretty heavy gambler at times, but - again - was never
addicted.

Never liked fruit machines, though. Apart from the garish lights and
the moronic "music", it's just very little to do with what I like
about gambling.