Could you pass the test?

Just for a bit of fun, I took a DSA mock theory motorcycle test.

http://www.dsa.gov.uk/mockpaper/theoryintro.htm# (Motorcycle Test 1)

I scored 34/35 :-D

Then I took the test again but with the answers that I'd use in the real
world. Unfortunately, options such as "Give them V-signs", "Nick the
casualty's bike" and "Burn your scooter" weren't available so I had to
go for sensible options with these types of questions.

Still, not bad:

25/35. Still a fail.

Bored? Go on, have a go!

 

34 & 31.

So what should I do if I break down in a tunnel?

 

34/35 too. Not too bad seeing as I passed car test in 1966 and bike in
1985.

 

34 and 33.

Turn on your hazard warning lights and go for help, it seems.

Or, in most cases ... Wander to the nearest shops. Buy some electrical
components and tools. Return to your bike. Wander to the nearest library
and ask to borrow "Electronics for dummies". Walk home and get some proof
of address. Walk back to the library. Join the library. Ask again to
borrow "Electronics for dummies". Wait while the 108 year old librarian
tries to find it on the computer. Talk about the weather. Go and read the
periodicals. Stick the latest "National Geographic" inside your jacket
while the 108 year old librarian tries, for the eighteenth time, to type
"dummies". End up borrowing "Advance guidance circuit design in fixed wing
aircraft". Walk halfway back to bike. Get bundled into the back of a van
by several large blokes wearing dark suits and sunglasses. Answer lots of
questions about why you're buying bomb making equipment and books about
aircraft design. Make pledge of allegiance, sing the entire US national
anthem and promise to vote Republican. Ask the dark suited blokes to drop
you near your bike. Attempt to wire up hazard warning lights in a tunnel in
the middle of the night using only the light from your digital watch.
Thirty hours after originally breaking down turn on hazard warning lights.
Remember that the US Secret Service took your mobile so that you couldn't
use it detonate bombs. Walk back to shops and use phone box to call the AA.
Explain to AA bloke that the "retard" who "complete fucked" your bike's
electrics was you, but that was _after_ it broke down. Watch AA bloke turn
petrol tap to "Reserve" and start bike at first attempt. Ride home.
Discover that there is no way to turn off your newly fitted hazard warning
lights.

Or is that just me?
--
AndrewR, D.Bot (Celeritas)
Kawasaki ZX-6R J1, Fiat Coupe 20v Turbo
BOTAFOT#2,ITJWTFO#6,UKRMRM#1/13a,MCT#1,DFV#2,SKoGA#0 (and KotL)
BotToS#5,SBS#25,IbW#34, DS#5, COSOC# Suspended, KotTFSTR#
The speccy Geordie twat.

 

35 & didn't bother.

Hazard lights and get help. Someone should tell Suzuki that...

 

31 and 33
car test in 64 car in 65

 

Yep, just you.

Classic.

--
ColonelTupperware,
spouting bollocks on Usenet since 1997
Usenet FAQ at
http://www.its.caltech.edu/its/services/internetapps/news/news2.shtml
UPCE FAQ at http://upce.org.uk/ UKRM FAQ at http://www.ukrm.net/faq/

 

Wow.. 35/35

 

33, and 33. Dammit. Got screwed cos I didn't know you must always use yer
steering lock when parked (???), and cos I DON'T HAVE ANY HAZARD LIGHTS!!!
And cos since when did they make bikes smaller than 50cc? And I passed my
test 12 years ago so I don't know about the bloody paperwork.

 

34 as well.

When leaving your motorcycle parked you should always...
"use the steering lock"

WTF is that all about? Am I missing some road safety related feature of
the steering lock or do learners actually get taught and tested on
crime prevention now?

 

OK 34/35


--
Molly
"Gower School" By Appointment".
GSX-R1000 (winter hack), Triumph Thunderbird,(year round hack)
GHPOTHUF#27 TGF, UKRMFBC#7, Two#24, BOTAFOF#11, YTC#9, GYASB#1.
SbS#23. DFWAG#2, DS#2, DIAABTCOD#20. remove "thisbit" in the reply
http://www.sportsbike.org
(our own race team)
http://www.bikegirl.co.uk/ladies/racingladies.html
"Nemo repente fuit turpissimus"

 

All then 49cc mopeds I reckon

 

Foto man wrote :

34/32 - Bike in 1964, car in 1968..

 

Harry Bloomfield says...

32/34 - Bike and car test both passed in April 1979. I rock

 

It was somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the

Sob quietly and curse the day you bought a BMW.

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19 COSOC#10

 

OK, so it's a bit dumb. But it was a multiple choice question and all of
the other answers were obviously wrong.

I guess it is as an anti-theft measure, although most steering locks are
pretty pathetic, and I'd certainly never use one if I've got a *proper*
lock with me.

 

It was the four part tyre question that got me, but what size but it's
on should make any difference; a duff tyre is a duff tyre.

 

... and a "F" in sig-snipping.

 

And another illiterate pops out from under a stone.
What is it - Care In The Community Night or something?

 

IIRC it makes a difference on the tread requirement. I think mopeds
only have to have a visible tread pattern - but I'm not a moped rider
so ICBW.

On test #2 it asks about Learners and pillions. I thought learners
could carry pillions if they had a full licence. It would appear not
though - was this ever the case? I'm sure it was...