Classic

Oh, I know - I'm not claiming originality. I'm fully intending to
actually develop a proper, edible diet though, with recipes for 3
meals per day with different meals for 2 weeks or so. They'll all just
be full of roughage and chilli, mind.

It's based on the principle of conservation of mass-energy: you weigh
all the food you eat, and work out the weight of your shite, and if
the first is less than the second, you *must* be losing weight.

And, in contrast to most other diets on the market, rather than
banning or drastically reducing alcohol intake, my diet will have
*mandatory* drinks to have with the main evening meal. You'll be able
to transfer the drink "allowance" to the lunch meal, with the added
bonus that this might make you sleep through dinner time, further
helping the weight-loss plan.

I'm /fairly/ serious about doing this: I've planned a few recipes
already[1], and I've got a URL[2] sorted out, and I do fully intend to
send off a sample chapter/precis to a few publishers for the print
version.

[1] basically, taking recipes from a few other faddish diets, filing
off the serial numbers, and adding chillies.
[2] www.slimwards.co.uk (it's a redirect for now)

 

Are you going to sell the little scales you can use to measure this?

May as well offer the full range of products.

 

oh yes.

Standard kitchen scales, in a tasteful light brown colour.

 

don't worry - the idea is that you simply weigh yourself before and
after taking a dump.

well, that's an option too.

"I quite like ER, even though they've kill off Dr.Romana now"

don't get the wrong idea, not stupidly high chilli content - just
enough to "combat the evils of consipation[tm]".

And lots of All-Bran.

 

Thankyou Dr Kellogg

 

The message <>

Ahem! A surprisingly large proportion of a log is made up of dead gut
flora. You might just be starving *THEM*.

Frayed knot. It's when you sleep after eating that you tend to lay down
subcutaneous fat. The old adage still holds true: Breakfast - eat like a
king. Lunch - eat like a lord. Supper - eat like a pauper.

I'll help with the recipes. Ask Anne J - my squirrel pie is a cracker.
But not for losing weight.

I'll think on it. After a few plates of Adkins (or wotever his name
were), mind.

 

The message <c29kuv$1qr559$-berlin.de>

And the German bog with the inspection ledge....

 

I see a market in shite scales.

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19 COSOC#10

 

Chicken wire across the bog.

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19 COSOC#10

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique, darsy

<Bzzzzt>

I think Douglas Adams can claim "prior art". Didn't he have a planet
where it was most important to get a receipt when you had a dump, lest
they surgically remove the weight when you left?

 

I thought that was Romania.

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19 COSOC#10

 

Bethselamin.

hth

--
| ___ Salad Dodger
|/ \
_/_____\_ GL1500SEV/CBR1100XXX/KH500A8/TS250C
|_\_____/_| ..62743../..14835.../..3157./.19406
(>|_|_|<) TPPFATUICG#7 DIAABTCOD#9 YTC#4 PM#5
|__|_|__| BOTAFOT #70 BOTAFOF #09 two#11 WG*
\ |^| / IbW#0 & KotIbW# BotTOS#6 GP#4
\|^|/ ANORAK#17
'^'

 

I thought the British Standard was cling-film?

 

you're all missing the point.

I'm not claiming originality.

I'm just going to do it "properly" rather than leaving it as a
one-liner.

 

It'd have to be perforated.

--

Dave

GS 850 x2 / SE 6a
SbS#6 DIAABTCOD#16 APOSTLE#6 FUB#3
FUB KotL OSOS#12? UKRMMA#19 COSOC#10

 

What does a crab call its home?








Michelle.

 

It must be. Ta!

 

I would jacket in now to avoid embarrasment.

 

I've tried that. I tend to weigh more _after_ a dump!

 

You're supposed to take your bladdy trousers down.