"And you work for a motorcycle accessories company...?"

I rang Busters Accessories this afternoon on the recommendation of a
cow-orker.

The guy I spoke with was about as useful as a chocolate fireguard.

I take it they're in Welsh Wales...? The guy I spoke to was very Welsh
indeed and seemed to have a budgie sat with him judging by the random
chirps in the background.

Anyhoo, the reason for the call was simple; I'd mentioned to said
friend/cow-orker that I wanted a "spare" screen for the GS and this is
pretty much a transcript of the ensuing telephone conversation.

Believe me, this isn't poetic licence at play...Imagine a
middle-aged-sounding tenor voice with a thick South Wales accent:

Me: Hi, I'm after a screen for a BMW 1150GS Adventure, but your website
doesn't list one. Can you do one?

Him: Oh, is that like a moulded-in thing, part of the fairing, like?

Me: No, it doesn't have a fairing...

Him: 'ang on a mo....[sounds of pages being turned]...Weeell, we 'ave a
number of screens listed 'ere; we've got the Givi...

[He goes on to read out the dimensions of several screens in millimetres]

Me: [interrupts] Ok, ok, but are they specifically for the GS Adventure or
are they "universal" screens?

Him: Weeell, see, if you 'ad a Bandit, like, any of these would fit, see?

Me: I don't have a Bandit, I have a BMW 1150 GS Adventure.

Him: Oh.

[pause]

Him: So it's not a naked bike?

Me: Not exactly, no.

Him: Ahh...

Me: I'm looking at your web-site now and you list a standard GS but not
the Adventure. You've got screens for the old "R" series, "K" series, the
F650 Funduro and what appears to be the standard R1150 GS but no mention
of the Adventure.

Him: Couldn't you use one of those, like?

Me: No, they're different. I want a pattern replacement for the one I've
got.

Him: What's it look like, then?

Me: Uh, the screen?

Him: Yes.

Me: Um, well...

Him: Is it a fly screen you're after?

Me: No, not really...

Him: Oh, right. 'Ang on, then...

[more sounds of pages being turned]

Him: Right then, there's some on page 3, some on page 5, some on 7, 9..

Me: [interrupting again] Yes, yes, very good, but I'm looking at your
website and it makes no mention of the Adventure. I don't have a
catalogue.

Him: Oh, right...

[pause]

Him: So do you want a catalogue, then?

Me: Does it have a screen for a BMW R1150GS Adventure in it?

Him: Doesn't seem to.

Me: Then how would that help?

Him: Hmm, I see.

[he then goes on with a load of patter about how screens are all very much
alike]

Me: Look, it's a specific screen for my bike I want. Do you have one?

Him: Is it a sports bike?

Me: No.

Him: So, it's not a sports bike, then?

Me: No.

Him: Oh, ok. I'm trying to imagine what one looks like; I'm sure I've seen
one. Is it one of these dual-sports bikes, then?

Me: It's like a giant trailie.

Him: Oh yes! I know what you mean; distinctive, like.

Me: Yeah, big and ugly.

Him: Oh, I wouldn't say that. A mate of mine's got one, I think. Attracts
attention it does.

Me: So do you do one?

Him: Umm...No.

Me: Ok.

Him: Do you have access to the internet?

Me: Uh, yes -- that's how I'm looking at your website right now...

Him: Ok then. What you want to do is try searching the internet for one.
Try putting in "BMW" and "Adventure" and "screen" and see what comes up.
There's loads of stuff on the internet.

Me: Ok, thanks for your time, bye.[click]

--
| Wik -UKRMHRC#10- 2003 R1150GSA -DC#1 -'FOT#0 'FOF #39 - BOD#12 BOB#12
|# You don't believe me | "Experience is the worst teacher.
|That the scenery | It always gives the test first
|Could be a cold-blooded killer. | and the instruction afterward."
***** human response from wik at blueyonder dot co dot uk *****

 

<snip>

They're based in Swansea. Which explains everything. ISTR they were
formed by a couple of ex-M&P directors when the (original) incarnation
of M&P went down the pan, so that kind of conversation doesn't really
surprise me.

 

Wik wrote in

Swansea. Mostly ex M&P staff which explains the levels of customer service

 

[snip]

and then you lost the will to live and threw yourself off a very tall
building. I'd actually forward your whole post to the managing director
of Busters with a clear statement that you won't be attempting to buy
from them ever again.

It's making me feel marginally happier that other people are having
their time wasted by clueless numbskulls this week. I've certainly had
my weekly allocation.

 

Please don't judge all Welsh people based on Svanseeee talk like. There you
are then...

 

Wik wrote:

<SNIP>

Sounds about right IIRC from going there.


--
SimonB - South Wales. BOF#32
email
http://simonb.zapik.co.uk
Triumph Sprint ST, ZXR750L2 Wazimbaki. Kawasaki Z1R *Still For Sale*
CON of the month http://zapik.com/simonb/fiddle.html

 

There's lovely innit.

--
Molly
Who am I? http://www.MollyG.net/intro2molly/about-me.htm
http://www.ads-training.co.uk
"Kneesliders Sponsored by Cane"
"Gower School" By Appointment".
GSX-R1000 (a girly bike), Triumph Thunderbird, GS500, GHPOTHUF#27
TGF, UKRMFBC#7, Two#24, BOTAFOF#11, YTC#9, GYASB#1. SbS#23.
DFWAG#2, DS#2, DIAABTCOD#20. remove "thisbit" in the reply
http://www.mollyg.net (our own endurance team) http://Team-ukrm.com
"Nemo repente fuit turpissimus"

 

GPZ wrote in

Swansea answers Wik's question about their location. My opinion relates to
M&P rather than a generalisation about the Welsh.

 

I really fucking hate the Welsh.

 

well, he needs a slap for a start...

At this point, it should be obvious to even a welshman
that it's a BMW R1150GS Adventure...

He's done a basic logic course at the OU then.

*classic*

 

Heh, typo - or your new opinion of your colleague, based on their
recommendation? ;o)

*Lovely* story though. You couldn't make it up.

 

http://www.catb.org/~esr/jargon/html/C/cow-orker.html

 

I still hate it, as it disguises the fact the co-worker is such a
horrible merkinism in the first place. I mean, what's wrong with
colleague, FFS?

Oh, and 'upcoming' is just as bad - really pisses me off, specially
when used by otherwise literate (i.e. British) people.

 

It's a phrase used by the sort who frequent alt.sysadmin.recovery.

You know, cunts.

 

Champ said:

Surely Mr Blaney has the right to express his opinions, and we should
support him in this and not castigate him?

<waits hopefully looking at empty sig>

 

I firmly believe that you should lose your internet access for those
kind of statements - then be sent to Wales with no escape, release date,
or parole.

<basks in the warm glow of a numberless sig>

 

Good, good.

Just because I'm... umm... quite some miles away doesn't mean I can't
glare at you, Champion.

Really, though, the Welsh are fucking annoying, aren't they? Hate is
a bit strong.

 

Bandolier wasn't "that" bad.

 

Ginge said:

^^^^ ^^^

Look like numbers to me old bean.

 

You know what I mean. No numbers representing membership of clubs,
groups, factions, etc.